Waiting For Happy
by rosesaregreen
Summary: Fitzgerald Thomas Grant III is preparing for the final steps in securing his Republican Party nomination. But a change of heart has him risking the possible presidency by divorcing his wife. As he works the campaign trail, he attempts to become the first single president of the united states-at least until he can claim Olivia as his first lady.
1. Chapter 1

_Someone once told me that you have to choose  
What you win or lose  
You can't have everything  
Don't you take chances  
Might feel the pain  
Don't you love in vain  
Cause love won't set you free_

Today was the day. It was 11:15 in the morning and Fitz was milling around his hotel room wasting time. Today was the day he would take one giant step towards his presidency. Today, he would accept the Republican party nomination at the Republican National Convention. He was elated and nervous, all the stereotypical human emotions to be expected on such a momentous day. Yet, he still felt empty. He wasn't at the peak of happiness that he knew he should be. His campaign rose from the ashes of ten points down and smashed Sally Langston on super Tuesday, basically garnering him the bid. Fitz was never supposed to be in the running for this. He was just some pretty boy Governor from the sunny side of the country who had everything he wanted in life fed to him with a silver spoon. Now, this wasn't necessarily true but that was how the media was playing him. Somehow the man that had to work for everything—acceptance, credibility and love—was the most privileged man in the world. He was the David that had to overcome Goliath.

But he never would have made it here alone. He had his firecracker of a wife Mellie by his side for over twenty years constantly pushing him to reach his potential. His best friend Cyrus Rutherford-Beene who had been his confidant and advisor since he graduated from Harvard law. And of course there was Olivia Pope. The campaign fixer. The love of his life. Olivia saved him in more ways than one. She saved his campaign and his dreams of becoming President. She saved his soul and his heart. She saved his fantasies of true love existing. The moment she walked into his campaign headquarters four months ago he felt the attraction. An attraction that he could not find a way to explain. He had been attracted to plenty of women over the years, more frequently since his marriage turned irreparably sour over the past two years. But something about Olivia shook him into the very depths of his soul. Her large brown doe-eyes, the smooth mocha shade of her skin, the way her hair was curled to the highest level of perfection about her beautiful heart shaped face. He had to have her. And he got her, but he was going crazy over the fact that eventually they would be no more. His entire life he wanted nothing more than to become the ruler of the free world, and now all he wanted was to hold his Livvie in his arms for all of eternity; in this life, in death and into the next.

"Look happy, Fitz. This is a pivotal day!" He felt her petite arms wrap around his waist and her head rest on his left shoulder. He took in her scent and closed his eyes allowing the view from his window to vanish from his eyes.

"I am happy."

"You don't look happy. You look...I don't know how to describe it. But happy is not the first nor second thing to come to mind." He turned so he was looking at her and he was instantly breathless. Every time felt like the first time when looking at her. His legs would go weak and his head spin a little.

"What's troubling you?" He took her face in his hands and rested his forehead on hers.

"Nothing."

"You suck at lying."

"If that were true people wouldn't think I was blissfully in love with my wife." She chuckled quietly. Mellie had always been a touchy subject for them. He had to fight Olivia from constantly calling herself a whore for sleeping with a married man. Morals were everything to her, and regardless of his marriage being long past dead, it sometimes made her feel cheap being with him. He spoke about a future with her and he honestly meant it. He was at his end with Mellie, divorce being on his mind for a long time. His connection with his wife was very similar to that of his father: he couldn't stand him and yet he could never rid of him. The man haunted him, prying at his insecurities and manipulating him constantly. He knew he was better off isolating himself from him, but he could never completely get away. He was obligated to Mellie for being with him during the worst times of his life, but he couldn't be with her anymore. Now he had a reason to leave.

"You really want to know whats bothering me?" Fitz was leading her around the hotel room in small circles, imaginary music leading their waltz.

"Obviously. I only asked about three times. And you know I never ask for anything twice." He smiled and kissed her lips gently.

"I don't want to go out there and accept that nomination without you by my side. That is whats bothering me." Her eyes shifted into small slits as she glared at him.

"Fitzgerald—"

"You know it turns me on when you say my name like that." She stopped their rhythm and broke their embrace.

"I'm not playing around. We have had this discussion a million times! This...whatever we are, can never be more. It never should have started to be honest."

"We are way beyond the shoulda coulda woulda's. It did we happen. We _did_ happen. We fell in love." She averted his gaze and he knew she was starting to retreat. "I'm starting to reconsider this."

"Reconsider what? Becoming president? Over a silly affair?"

"Liv, stop. This is serious."

"I'm the only one here being serious!"

"Look, the past few months with you have been the greatest of my entire life. I just feel so content with you. I don't have to be anything or anyone other than myself. I have been searching my whole life for this feeling. I thought it would come by winning a presidency but now...everything I knew before you was superficial."

"You know better." She sighed deeply and rubbed at her temples. "I love you, so so much. I don't think I have the words to explain how much I love you. But I know how much becoming president means to you. I want this for you. No, I need this for you. I can take any reason from you for backing down, but I cannot be it. You need something better than fresh love."

"Says who?" He closed the space between them and placed a kiss on her neck. Her body tensed for a moment then instantly relaxed.

"Says the supposed love of your life." He kissed his way up her neck to her cheeks and finally her lips.

"Not supposed. There is no question that you are the one." She fell into his kiss, her body completely entangled with his. Their lips moved against each other seamlessly, like air moving through the universe. His hands moved to the tiny buttons on her silk blouse. As he began to pry at them her hands rested on top of his halting him. She shook her head.

"We can't right now. We have work to do."

"Work can wait." He captured her lips again and lifted her into the air causing her legs to wrap around his waist tightly. She was laughing into his kiss, her sounds of happiness vibrating inside of him.

"Fitz." She said softly. He looked at her, the wide grin on her lips had faded to a simple smirk. "The country is waiting for you. Lets not keep them waiting forever." He thought about her words for a moment. He set her down and watched her as she grabbed her laptop from her bag by the dresser. As they went over his speech his mind was never completely focused. Her words were stirring around him. Fitz spent his entire life not following his own heart and pleasing others. He could never leave anyone else waiting. Fitz was tired of waiting.

_Holding on tightly  
Just can't let it go  
Just trying to play my role  
Slowly disappear  
But all these days, they feel like they're the same  
Just different faces, different names  
Get me out of here  
_

"This is so exciting! We're one step closer to Pennsylvania Avenue!" Mellie was running around the green room tidying and touching things. She was so restless from her excitement at her becoming closer to the title of First Lady. She couldn't help herself when she got excited, she had to be in control, so she would just tidy up. Fitz watched her out of boredom. It was now 8:30 in the evening and he would be giving his speech at 9:15. His excitement from earlier had all died away as the moment grew closer. He was thinking himself into oblivion and being with his wife for the past five hours had driven him to the edge. So he watched her, hoping to find a morsel of what attracted him to her all those years ago. There was something beyond her bold strength and dedication to her goals that drew him to her. There was something, but for the life of him he could not remember what it was. Fitz concluded that the "something" was never there, but simply his rationalizing for marrying the wrong woman. He spent the past twenty years of his life trying to figure out why he would marry someone who wasn't the love of his life. He believed in love and miracles along with hard work and dedication. Marrying someone out of convenience was never in his plans. But, when Fitz wanted something he could never have it. He wanted to wait for love, but everyone else had political capital to gain. Life: two million. Fitz: zero.

"Did you tweak your speech today?" Mellie asked him which sent him back to reality. He nodded. He and Olivia worked on the final touches of his speech for about an hour before Cyrus came to grab her to get ready for the long day. He was sad that they didn't get to spend more time together. He knew that after today their time together would begin to dwindle.

"Well? How does it sound?" She was looking at him with this eagerness. She was living through Fitz, her desires to be in the oval working through him like puppet strings. She wanted to imagine herself up on that podium accepting the nomination. At this point Fitz was willing to switch places with her.

"Its magnificent. We worked really hard on it." She skipped over to the table covered in h'orderve's and drinks and grabbed herself a bottle of water. Fitzgerald felt like he was suffocating.

"I want a divorce." The words slipped from his mouth and for a moment he was scared shitless. Mellie's back tensed to a 180 degree position.

"I'm sorry, honey. I didn't hear what you said." She turned around slowly, a fake smile on her face. Fitz knew he was given the chance to take it all back, to change his mind and stick to the status quo and become president. But he didn't want to. He felt powerful.

"I want a divorce, Mellie. I can't do this marriage anymore."

"_Excuse me_?" She seethed. The smile was gone now and the true Mellie was revealed.

"Don't act like this marriage hasn't been over for years!"

"That is not the point here! You are twenty minutes away from walking out on stage in front of millions of viewers and accepting the nomination to run for _president_. You expect to keep your nomination, much less win with a scandal to start that off?"

"This isn't a scandal. I don't want to like to the American people or to myself anymore! They deserve better. I deserve better."

"Who else will walk around and wipe your ass like I do? I saved you, Fitz! When you were a little broken and shattered overgrown man child, I was around. I glued you back together, piece by piece, and turned you into a political powerhouse. You think you can keep this up without me? I will end you." A roaring laugh escaped from the pits of his belly. It was becoming hard to breathe, he was laughing so hard.

"What are you laughing at?"

"You!...Me!...Hell, I don't even know!" He choked out between breaths. "I just...I don't fucking care anymore! If I become president or not anymore, it honestly does not matter to me. I want it, I really do, but I want happiness more. I want to _live_. I can't live if I am still chained to you."

"What makes you think I will agree to a divorce? Are you even thinking about Jerry and Karen?"

"Mellie, the kids have literally come to me suggesting we split up. They are just as fed up with this shell of a marriage as I am."

"What the hell are you going to do? Walk on that stage and accept that nomination just to have it taken away?"

Fitz shrugged. He honestly had no fucks to give.

_So what if it hurts me?  
So what if I break down?  
So what if this world just throws me off the edge  
My feet run out of ground_

As Fitz waited in the wings for his time to go on stage, he paced frantically. He was nervous. Could he really go out there and just use the speech he already had? Everything had changed in the past half hour and now nothing was certain. His entire speech was on the certainty that he was the perfect choice for this nomination and the country. He wasn't even sure where he would be sleeping tonight.

"You ready, Fitz?" Her voice sang to him. She was standing next to him looking at the monitor as the Governor of New Jersey was introducing him.

"I asked Mellie for a divorce." He could hear her neck crack as she turned to face him.

"You _what_?"

"I am getting a divorce and I am going to become president of the United States."

"Are you out of your mind? Why would you do that?"

"Because the American people deserve a president that is willing to be honest about all aspects of his life. I couldn't lie about loving her anymore. Not while loving you." They kept facing forward; they knew one glimpse at each other and they would fall apart.

"You cannot ruin your chances to be with me!"

"I am not doing this for you. I'm doing it for me. I deserve better. I deserve a first lady that loves and appreciates me and raises me up. I deserve you." He wrapped her in his arms and kissed her quickly.

The crowd erupted in applause and Fitz took the stage leaving Olivia before she could speak again. He embraced the governor then waved at the crowd. He took the crowd in; the American people were watching him now. They were waiting on him to sell himself to them. They were waiting on him to express his undying devotion to the woman he loves, his true first lady. They would vote him into office not simply for his political platform, but his complete honesty.

Because he was a man in love with an incredible woman.

And there was nothing more honest than that.

_I gotta find my place  
I wanna hear my sound  
Don't care about all the pain in front of me  
Cause i'm just trying to be happy  
_


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: So I decided to keep this one going. So many ideas jumped into my head. (o;**

* * *

"Are you out of your fucking mind?" Cyrus screamed at Fitz. They were two days into project "knock some sense into Fitzgerald" and its lack of effect was sending Cyrus to his breaking point. Fitz had not given up on his dedication to revealing and going through with a divorce with Mellie much to the chagrin of his campaign workers. Mellie had flown home to California to take some time for herself and regroup. She begged him to wait a week. Fitz was done waiting.

"Cyrus, I'm finally getting a clue! Four more years of faking it with Melle—eight if we do reelection—I cannot do it! The American people deserve a president who is completely honest with them. I deserve to be honest with myself!"  
"You really think people will vote for a single man in office?" Fitz turned to the conference room door and watched as Olivia walked towards them. "People don't trust single. Single means I can't make up my mind or I just want to have fun. Married equals complacent and comfortable. Trusting and stable. Single is wild and trashy. You go forward with this and you ruin any chances you ever had of winning." She was staring at him with harsh intensity. She hadn't talked to him since the night of the RNC and he was willingly giving her space. She was pissed at him, and in some way she had the right to be.

"Who said I would be single when I get to the oval?" She rolled her eyes and turned away from him. Cyrus had a quizzical look on his face, like he was trying to read between the lines.

"Fitz, we can throw any platform we want at the voters, if you try this divorce it won't matter! How are you not understanding this?"

"I understand this perfectly. I say you're wrong. Screw the pollsters and the data sheets. Projections can be wrong. I can win this, I know I can!"

"Yes, you can win this! But you can't win with something this big running against you." Fitz watched Olivia; her back was still facing him, the muscles clearly tensed.

"Cy, we need the room." Cyrus ran his hand down his face and sighed.

"You try knocking some sense into that blockhead!" He stormed out leaving the two of them. Fitz took a few steps towards Olivia.

"Livvie—"

"Don't!" She raised her hand to stop him. She looked stressed and over this entire situation.

"You're mad at me."

"Mad is only the base of what I feel right now." She finally turned to face him. Her right eyebrow always twitched when she was really upset and it was going wild right now. Her dagger eyes always instilled a little fear in Fitz, but more than anything it turned him on. The levels of power that exuded from her when she was steaming was out of this world and he loved it.

"I haven't seen you in two days. I haven't slept in two days."

"You didn't even give me a chance to think about this!"

"I know I am placing you in an impossible situation."

"Beyond impossible!"

"You have to believe this decision goes deeper than just you and me. Twenty wasted years with Mellie. Twenty years of being trapped in a cycle of beating each other down and trying to rebuild when there are no more bricks to build with. I cannot imagine living that way any longer, especially not in front of the entire world. And now I have you...I have no reason to live that way anymore. You helped me rebuild, Olivia. You turned this rickety shack into a sturdy abode. I may not be going through with this divorce solely because of you, but I need you to stand by me. I need you to be by my side along the way to get through this."

A wave of emotions were flowing between her eyes. She was conflicted and excited; hopeful yet frightened. This was a lot to spring on her, but this was a situation that even had the fixer stumped.

"Both of our careers, our reputations are the line here! I have a job, a very _nice_ job, waiting for me when this is all over. You have a real chance at the highest seat in the land and you want to throw it away?"

"If I can't have this job and be happy then maybe I don't need it. I will sacrifice anything for this land and its wellbeing, but if the country won't accept me in my quest for happiness then maybe this isn't a relationship that needs to grow." Fitz wrapped his hands around Olivia's waist and pulled her to his chest. She went without complaint. She grabbed a handful of his jacket in frustration.

"Are we really doing this?" She whispered into him.

"We are doing this. We take on this PR storm and march into the White House."

"Or we burn in flames trying."

* * *

Fitz lay in his bed going over another handful of data sheets Cyrus sent to his door in an attempt to sway his decision. It wasn't looking good for the California governor. This divorce would be political suicide for him, but the threat of total destruction slightly excited him. Fitz had never felt so alive. He put the files idown and smashed his head into his pillow. He looked to the empty left side of the bed and sighed. Olivia would probably leave him to his insomnia for another night. He thought about calling and begging her to stay the night but he knew better. Trying to convince her to act like things weren't about to drastically change would be foolish.

Fitz couldn't sleep without her and that situation went both ways. The first night she snuck into his hotel room—in her blue fleece pajama bottoms and black tank top with her hair wrapped up in a messy bun—they just talked about their lives, lost and acquired aspirations and the future. His last moments before drifting into blissful sleep were spent watching her snore softly. He knew he could never spend his nights without her by his side.

But here he was without her. His attempts at letting her know he was ready to make their relationship permanent were met with a blockade. Story of Fitzgerald's life. Fitz's ears perked up at what sounded like his hotel room door unlocking. It had to be a figment of his imagination seeing as no one had a key to his room besides himself and—

"Hi." His woman was standing in the bedroom doorway, her purple silk bottoms showing beneath her matching silk robe. Her hair was up in a ponytail, a few stray curls surrounding her face. She took the robe off and threw it on the chair. Fitz quickly gathered up the files and stuck them hastily in their folders. Olivia jumped onto her side of the bed and snuggled into his chest. A blissful sigh left both of their lips simultaneously.

"I'm still mad at you." She said softly causing him to chuckle.

"Okay."

"I'm just so tired." She yawned loudly. "I want sleep. Thats the only reason...that I am here."

"Mmhmm." Fitz hit the light switch next to his bed then pulled the covers over them.

"You need to get Mellie to...to agree to do a news conference to announce...the...the thing. I have a...date set." Her eyes fluttered shut.

"Mhmm."

"Stop that." He yelped as she bit his nipple gently.

"What!"

"Stop mhmm-ing me! I'm trying to...to have a conversation." She yawned again, this one taking the last of her energy with it.

Fitz kissed her head and gazed at her. A soft moonlit glow was coming in through the window making her look heavenly. This would probably be the last moment of honest peace they would have together for awhile and they were too exhausted to savor it.

He contemplated waking her to coax her into pushing whatever date she had in mind for this conference, but decided against it. She was so content in this moment that waking her would be a sin. It could wait until morning.


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: So happy about the response to this! Glad I decided to continue it that y'all are enjoying it (o: You guys are the greatest! **

* * *

"Absolutely not!" Mellie walked away from Fitz but he was right on her tail.

"You cannot keep fighting this, Mellie! This divorce is happening, now get on board!"

"In what universe would I ever agree to a divorce, Fitz? I cannot believe you are being serious! I gave you a week to get your shit together and here you are still completely out of your mind!" They stared each other down, their breathing heavy from the argument. Fitz and his team flew back to California for the press conference Olivia had set up for two days from now. They thought it would look better if they did it from their home; it would add a "personal touch". Fitz constantly wondered where that woman got her ideas from, but he never questioned her gut.

"This isn't a game. I want a divorce. I am not going into the white house with all this baggage on my back." Mellie let out a cackle.

"Honey, the closest you are going to get to the white house trying to divorce me is holding a picket sign outside of the gate!"

"Get on board, Millicent."

"And since when am I baggage? If anyone is baggage, its you! I had to save your ass from the gutters when your daddy beat you down! I had to build you from scratch! I created you, Fitzgerald! You are here because of the _twenty years_ I put into you! You really think I am going to let this all be in vain? That address is _mine_, not yours!" Fitz shook his head in disbelief. The world revolved around Mellie and what she wanted. It still shocks him how selfish she could be and her lack of remorse for it. He was suddenly so happy to be back in the hell he called home. The past few months their arguments have been festering, unable to fully reach capacity since they were always in hotel rooms.

"I am so done with you saying you made me. You created me, Mellie? You made me the man I am today? No! You beat me down. You told me I was worthless without you and that I needed you to be something. You treat me like shit, boss me around and plot things behind my back. You made me weak. The man I am today is a man who is strong, who knows what he wants and believes in himself. A man who has stepped into the shoes fit for a leader. I know I am stronger without you, because I know what is best for myself and the people around me. The only thing that you have done for me is helped me realize that I can't waste anymore of my time being a bottom bitch for some power hungry pimp. You did _not_ create me." The shock on Mellie's face gave Fitz such an immense level of pleasure he couldn't stand it. It was setting in that he was a new man. A man done with the bullshit and ready to start his life anew.

"Who is it?"

"What?"

"Who is she? You would never come to these conclusions on your own. Twenty years together, Fitz. I know you like the bill of rights. This change...its too sudden to not be from some influence. So who is she? Who are you leaving me for?"

"See, this is your problem! You don't believe that I am capable of doing anything for myself!"

"Because you can't!" Fitz got in her face and she held his gaze. "You do not scare me."

"You should be scared. Do. Not. Push. Me."

"Umm...Governer Grant? Mrs. Grant?" They turned to the kitchen doorway where Olivia was standing with a clipboard in her hands. She was wearing a grey skirt-suit, her pale pink button down shirt accentuating the glow of soft mocha skin. Her hair was up in a chignon.

Fitz stepped away from Mellie and closer to Liv.

"I don't mean to interrupt, but—"

"No, no, its fine. What is it?" Fitz cut her off quickly. He was done talking to the she-witch anyway.

"Your taping with Jay Leno is in an hour. We kind of need you. But if you need more time—"

"Nonsense. Everything is settled here. Right, Mellie?" She was watching them quizzically. "Everyone is on board. _Right_?" She was staring at Olivia, her eyes narrowing. Olivia touched her neck and reached for hair to place behind her ear, realizing there was none to mess with. Fitz could tell Olivia was incredibly uncomfortable. Mellie smiled.

"Yes. I'm on board. Whatever you want, ." Mellie had a look in her eyes that Fitz didn't trust for a minute. She was up to something. He didn't have time to dwell on it now, he had things to do. She agreed to the press conference and divorce, which was a big enough accomplishment for today.

"Alright, then." Fitz met Olivia at the doorway and saw the discomfort in her eyes. "You okay?" He whispered to her softly. He assumed she heard the entire conversation. She always hated how Mellie treated Fitz. She couldn't fathom how anyone could see him as anything other than miraculous.

"I should be asking you that question."

"Never felt more alive." They shared a smile. Fitz placed his hand on her back and led her out to the car. He could feel Mellie's gaze on them but he was beyond caring.

* * *

"Last chance to take it all back. We can forget about all this, go back to being the team I know we can be." Mellie was leaning into Fitz, her whisper soft but loud enough to be audible. He wasn't sure if their microphones were on yet, praying they weren't. They were set up in their living room, next to each other on the couch but their bodies facing apart. This wasn't intentional, just habit after years of drifting apart.

"You said you were on board." He whispered back.

"I don't want to lose you. I love you, Fitz. You are making a huge mistake! Everything we—you have worked for down the drain. Is that what you want?"

"Stop acting like this is a marriage based on love. This was a political marriage. Whatever happens falls on me now. You are onboard my ship now, so sit down, put on your seatbelt and shut up."

"You are going to regret this. I won't go down quietly. I will get what I deserve."

"Shut up."

"Good morning!" Caroline Murphy, the top reporter for CNN, sat down across from them and shook their hands quickly. She was going to conduct the interview. Olivia enticed the network with the exclusive announcement and they couldn't pass it up.

"Sixty seconds, Governor!" The director shouted to them. Fitz found Olivia standing next to the director, headset in her ear. She was watching intently, searching for signs of distress. He smiled at her and her eyes responded with a soft gaze.

"Oh my god." Mellie said in awe.

"Five seconds!"

"Fitz, you didn't—"

"Four!"

"Stop talking and look at the camera!" He seethed.

"Three! Two!" The red light of the camera came on and they were live.

"Good morning Governor Grant! Mrs. Grant! It is such a pleasure to hold you two for this exclusive interview."

"Its a pleasure to be here, Caroline."

"Good morning. I love that blouse on you!" Mellie said sweetly.

"So, lets get down to business? The media has been buzzing about this exclusive announcement. We were so excited that you chose to share with only us."

"We couldn't imagine sharing such important news with anyone but you, Caroline!"

"There are _a lot _of rumors running around, the biggest one being the big B."

"Big B?" Fitz asked, genuinely confused.

Caroline leaned in closer and whispered, "Baby." Fitz almost choked on the air in his lungs.

"Well, it is definitely _not_ a baby." Mellie answered with an edge to her voice. It would take more than their collective fingers to count how long it had been since they last touched each other.

"Well, what is it then?" Mellie and Fitz shared a look, asking "who's going to say it".

"Well, Caroline, after a lot of soul searching and counseling and effort, Fitz and I have...gosh, I'm sorry. This is tough for me to say." She pulled out a tissue from the table next to her and dabbed at her eyes. Man, his wife was something else. "You say it, Fitz." He looked at Olivia who touched her hands and nodded her head. He took Mellie's hands in his and kissed them.

"Mellie and I have decided to get a divorce." Caroline's face was rampant with shock, her eyes wide and mouth wider.

"Oh my goodness. Are you sure?" They nodded. "But...you look so happy on the campaign trail! And while you were governor you two were inseparable!"

"Yes, we have always been a team. But lately we have just fallen apart. Maybe its the office hours." They laughed softly. "We tried so hard to find our way back to each other. So many years together, letting those fall away was never an option."

"Sometimes when you are with someone as long as we have, you realize how much has changed." Fitz chimed in. He knew if Mellie had majority of air time, it would paint him in a negative light. He decided to be candid and spill what he truly felt.

"We have both grown into mature and intelligent people, but with that we have changed so much from who we once were. We aren't those kids straight out of law school struggling anymore. We have experienced so much together and taught each other so many things that can never be forgotten. But, sometimes, you have to know when to move on. When you find something that makes you happier than anything ever in your life, you stop running and go for that. We just realized that that thing can't be found with each other. Not anymore." Fitz felt a tear fall down his face and he went to wipe it away but Mellie beat him to it. He didn't know why he was crying, this announcement was something he had dreamed about. It was strange; this separation was becoming real. He didn't know how to handle this. It was sad actually; twenty years together and now it was ending. It may seem sudden to others, but Fitz thought long and hard about this decision. Two decades was no laughing matter.

"Wow. The love is definitely still there with you two. So this is a completely mutual decision?" Fitz looked at Mellie who seemed to be searching for the right words. She nodded and he felt a rush of relief.

"We decided this together. After counseling and trips with just us. It just wasn't there anymore. It was starting to get painful. We were hurting each other emotionally and we love each other too much to keep doing that." For an instance he saw sadness in her eyes. It was like she was suddenly seeing all she once loved about her husband. If only for a moment.

"How will this effect your children?"

"We have talked to them about this already. They are doing alright. Upset like most children would be." Mellie had no idea that Karen and Gerry knew about the divorce. Fitz stopped to see them on his way to California to fill them in. They weren't too broken up about it, more relieved. They loved their parents, but not when they were together.

"What does this mean for your bid for the White House? America has never had a single president."

"Well, my platform has been based on a new beginning. I want to bring a new start for this country and I guess looking at it now, I will be going in with a fresh slate as well. Art imitating life. This is definitely a difficult time for my family and I, but I want the American people to know that this will not distract me from the task at hand or my values. I am still a family man who adores his children and will always love their mother. Mellie means the world to me, and she could never be taken out my life completely."

"I'm still voting for him!" Mellie added with a smile. He squeezed her hand tightly.

"Wow. Well, certainly wish the best for you both and your futures. Goes to show that even the strongest of marriages can fall apart. I'm Caroline Murphy, lets take it back to the studio." The red light went black and the room was silent. Plenty of eyes were teary or filled with left over shock. "That was a great interview. Really eye opening. Sincerity truly came through."

"Thank you." They replied together.

"Can I ask a question? Off the record?" They nodded. "Is this really the only reason? I know you have a campaign to run an a scandal would be detrimental but...I know this town like the back of my hand. Politicians love a good extramarital affair."

"There was no infidelity, Caroline." Fitz said sternly. He was doing his best to keep from looking at Olivia. She was doing everything to protect his reputation so now he had to do the same by behaving himself.

"Alright. Thank you again for the interview, Governor. Mrs. Grant."

* * *

"I want to see you."

"You can't. You just announced your divorce. The media is insane right now. Trust no one." Fitz adjusted the phone on his shoulder. They were back to a hotel for the night, preparing to fly out to their next campaign stop in Iowa the next morning. Just as he predicted, he was placed on a timeout from Liv. They had to sacrifice sleep for the rest of this campaign because now everyone was an enemy. The walls have ears and eyes, and there was no doubt that a campaign worker would happily run a sighting to a tabloid.

"I don't care about everyone else. I only care about you. You need me."

"Oh? I'm not the one begging his mistress to come over so he can take a nap."

"Touche." The sighed and listened to each others synchronized breathing. "You know I hate when you do that."

"Do what?"

"Call yourself a mistress. You know better."

"Fitz, can we not? I'm way too tired."

"Alright, alright. So, how did I do today?"

"You were magnificent. Want to know why?"

"Sure."

"Because you weren't faking it. Everything you said was sincere and honest. You meant those words. I could never teach you how to do that. You put your big boy pull-ups on. Mama was so very proud." He smiled at her praise. "You just might make it through this."

"_We_. We're in this together, remember?" He could feel her smile from across the hall.

"_We_ just might make it through this." She yawned which reminded his body of his exhaustion.

"Are you ready to sleep?"

"You mean to attempt to sleep? Sure."

"Goodnight, sweet baby."

"Goodnight, Governor." He pulled the covers up his chest and placed the receiver next to him on the pillow. He closed his eyes and listened to her breathing, soft and constant, in and out. It didn't take long for them to drift off, dreaming of being in each others arms and the bright future ahead of them.


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: Sorry for delay in posting, alot has been going on and I will be very busy for the next couple of weeks so just a heads up! I'm so glad you guys are really liking this one. I was so reluctant to keep it going but it seems to be a favorite! I appreciate all the support for my crappy writing and will do my best to get updates up ASAP! 3 **

* * *

"Fitz, you have to go." Olivia did her best to be serious but it was difficult when Fitz was nibbling on her ear.

"Nope. Three whole weeks. _Three weeks_." She didn't need a reminder. It had been three weeks and two days to be exact. It was so difficult to stay strong. Seeing him everyday on the trail and not being able to even look in his direction unless warranted? This task made the Bar seem like a spelling test. They were surviving off of stolen 'one minutes' in conference rooms, secret hand holding in the back of the bus and midnight pillow talk. It was enough to get by, but they were people of deep desires that required complete contact to be satisfied.

"Someone could hear us!" She giggled as he pressed her aching body against the wall. Someone made the mistake of placing their rooms right next to each other. Their rooms had the connecting doors which made avoiding contact tonight basically impossible.

"I hope they do." He said before hungrily capturing her lips. Olivia was nearly there just from the feeling of his lips on hers. She didn't realize just how long three weeks was until this moment. It should frighten her how desperate she always was for his touch, but it simply elated her. It made her feel alive, needing someone this bad. She was so lost in the pleasure of him, she didn't even realize their clothes had met the floor.

"I. Need. You." She panted as he lifted her by her ass and she wrapped her legs around his waist. She plunged her hands into his boxers, grabbing onto his length and stroking gently. She smiled: the knowledge that she was able to bring him to complete disarray made her feel powerful. Knowing she was the cause of his moans of pleasure and desire made her feel immaculate.

"Shit, Liv." They were both at the precipice, so ready for each other that it hurt. He turned them around so her back was against the wall, and she bit his lip to let him know she was ready. As she slid his boxers off his hips a loud knock came to her door. They froze instantly praying it was a figment of their imagination. The knock came again, louder this time.

"Liv?" It was Cyrus. Fitz rested his head on her shoulder and groaned in frustration.

"You have _got_ to be kidding me!"

"Sssh!" She released her constrictor grip on his hips and landed on the floor. She had to push Fitz away to get free. "Go back to your room." She whispered. "Coming, Cy!"

"I'm not leaving."

"Lower your voice!" She grabbed her robe out of the closet and covered herself quickly.

"_Three weeks_." She watched him, naked and vulnerable. Three weeks was eternity and she felt the pulsing need from deep within her to forget her duties and take this man.

"Closet. And be quiet!" She grabbed his hand and shoved him into the closet. "Not a _sound_." He pulled her by her waist and traced her lips with his tongue causing her to moan with delight.

"Now who needs to be quiet?" He said with a devious smile. She captured his nipples and twisted them taking satisfaction from his yelp of pain before shutting the door. She surveyed herself in the closet mirror: she looked ravaged with swollen lips and red marks from him sucking down her neck and shoulders. She was praying this was a quick visit. When she opened the door Cyrus stormed in.

"What was all that noise?" He asked her looking around the room. Olivia's eyes grew wide with terror as she noticed Fitz's clothes were still laying on the floor. She raced around her friend and kicked them under the desk before he could notice.

"The t.v. was up really loud." He watched her closely then decided to forget it. "Whats up, Cy? Is it something about James?"

"No, no. We're fine. Its just...its about Fitz." Her heart skipped a beat at the sound of his name.

"What about him?"

"I just...I'm worried about him. This sudden change in him. Its scaring me. I'm not saying its bad or anything its just...strange. As long as I have known him he has never been able to just let everything go. His father really fucked him up, and with Mellie it got even worse. He just went with the flow, his naivety and belief in the good in people being enough. And that was okay for being governor. But for president? A president has to be tough and unruly and full of passion and incapable of feeling remorse for the tough decisions.

"And now he has _that_ fire in him. He is suddenly so involved and candid and caring about the campaign and everyone around him. Its great but I just don't know how long this will last." Olivia pulled her robe around her tighter. Cyrus had a twinkle in his eye, a glimmer of hope and pride. He loved Fitz like his own son and seeing him evolve pulled something out of him.

"His numbers are rising now that the divorce has settled in. This is a good thing! Its translating to the people."

"I know, I know. I just wish I knew why. He would never just divorce Mellie out of the blue. Twenty years of complacency and then suddenly he is just done? I know him too well to fall for that. I don't know who this Fitz is and it makes me uncomfortable. I have always known him so well and now he is a wildcard. I don't like it." Olivia heard a loud thud from the closet and her body tensed. She was going to _kill_ him.

"Did you hear that?" Cy said looking around the room.

"Hear what?" She was trying to play coy but her heart was beating rapidly. Her little secret hidden in the closet was trying to escape. "You know, you shouldn't underestimate Fitz. Certain situations force the hidden qualities out of us and I think the pressure of becoming president has caused him to look at his life. This Fitz has always been there, maybe now he finally has a reason to bring him to the light."

"Maybe so. I don't know, I'm still so curious." The thud came again and she knew Fitz was messing with her. Cyrus was definitely right, this new rebellious side of Fitz was scary. Lord knows what he was capable of.

"Well, its late. Go get some sleep. We can talk tomorrow."

"Do you want me to call the concierge about that noise?"

"No! You go back to your room." She smiled as she pushed him towards the door. She kissed him goodnight and sent him on his way. The moment the door closed the closet opened and she was wrapped in strong arms. She pushed him away.

"Are you fucking insane? What are you thinking! Or are you just not thinking at all?" She slapped his back which only caused his grin to grow to a full blown smile.

"I couldn't help it!"

"You are out of your mind! Leave!" She turned her back to him and crossed her arms across her chest. She was actually mad at him and her mood was gone. He put them in danger of becoming exposed.

"Aww, Livie." He came behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist. She could feel him still standing at attention which brought some of the fire back to her.  
"You stood up for me." He whispered in her ear before capturing her lobe in his mouth.

"Did not."

"You did! You stood up for your man." She turned to face him.

"You are _not_ my man."

"Oh? Then what am I?"

"I haven't decided yet. But right now, per usual, you are acting like a child." A sudden sadness came into his eyes.

"No one has ever defended me before." The sadness in his voice hit Olivia like a brick. "Do you agree with Cy? All the things he said about me?" His hands slid to the tie on her robe and pulled the bow until it came undone. She didn't stop him when he pushed the silky fabric from her moment his fingers touched her skin the hunger was back.

"Fitz, baby, don't you worry about Cyrus." She could see the doubt coming back to him. Since the night he took the nomination the doubt had gone away; he had been so sure of himself lately and the decisions he was making. The rejection of Jerry and Mellie made him strong, but to know that one of the people he trusted most doubted him? He held onto his low self-esteem like an addict and it wouldn't take much to for him to relapse.

"You are brilliant and strong and destined for this. I will spend the rest of my life reminding you of this if I have to. But for now—" She pushed him down on the bed and climbed on top of him not wasting anytime as she took what she had craved every moment for the past weeks inside. He sat up to hold her in his arms and she wrapped hers around his neck. They stayed like this for what felt like eternity, savoring the feeling of being together again. The slight discomfort of him filling her was a feeling she could never tire of; her slick walls feeling more like home to Fitz than any other tangible place.

"—but for now, just know I love you." She whispered with sincerity. He brushed his lips across hers gently as he began to rock her, steady and slow.

"I love you too, sweet baby."

* * *

The election was less than two months away and things were starting to look up for the Grant campaign. After the initial depression in Fitz's approval after the divorce announcement, they were starting to rise again. The Republican candidate was looking refreshed and young, his personality shining during events and rallies. The American people were starting to like him again, and for the first time, he was really starting to like himself. He was loving being with the people and took extra time to speak one on one with supporters even when he was on a tight schedule. He took his hardest hit with women, and he received many questions on his divorce at women's rallies. He was always kind and honest with them, and even if they had a preconceived negative view on the man, they always left with a better view. He had a real chance at winning this election and having the life he always wanted. He was having his cake and eating it too.

"Where are we today, Liv?" They were already on the road, their departure time this morning was 4:45. He had no clue where they were going most of the time; they would sometimes hit three different locations in a single day.

"North Carolina. We're starting to hit the bible belt so we need to go over your speech's again to make sure you don't offend supporters with your fairly liberal republicanism." He shot her a quick smile, her cheeks awakening with blush.

"This is going to be a tough spot for the campaign. Your numbers are still struggling down there. They aren't too found of your divorce proceedings."

"Do we really need to worry about it, though? The southern states won't vote for Reston. This is red state territory, I think we're pretty safe."

"Maybe so but family values are crucial down there. When I say you're hurting, I don't mean by a little. I mean you took a _huge _ hit."

"How much we talking?" Cyrus pulled out the data.

"Grant down by ten, Reston gaining six."

"And this is across the board?"

"Just about give or take a few points."

"May I suggest something?" Olivia perked up. She finished her first cup of coffee and her mind was officially working. "We may need to bring in some reinforcements."

"Like who?" She shot a glance at Fitz and he instantly knew.

"You aren't serious." She shrugged.

"It would really help." Cyrus caught the gaze.

"Are you thinking what I think you are thinking?" He asked his favorite student, their minds still somewhat in sync.

"We need Mellie back."

"How could that help anything?" Fitz was growing irritated. The whole point of divorce and separation was being _away_ from the significant other.

"The united front you guys created during the interview is a reason why you are rebounding. The mutual agreement that not going into this presidency with a bad marriage is great for the image. You guys working together on the campaign plants the right idea in the voters minds."

"Or it confuses them! I don't want people thinking we are getting back together."

"Let them think that if it gets them to the polls! They can cry about their broken hearts after we move onto 1600 Penn!" Cyrus added with sudden gusto. He was completely onboard. He always liked Mellie, her fire and political bluntness reminded him of himself. She was a political animal, but he was a political _monster_.

"I don't like it." Fitz crossed his arms like a child, causing Liv to roll her eyes. His childlike tendencies irritated her beyond explanation.

"With all due respect, governor, you already got your choice. You wanted a divorce and you got it. You no longer get to pick and choose with how this campaign works. Let me do my job and get you elected."

"Alright, fine. But only on the condition that there is no putting us together like a couple. This needs to be strictly professional."

"We can do that." Cyrus slammed his hand on the table marking the decision as unwritten law. He was ecstatic. "I'll call her!" He made his way to the front of the bus leaving the couple alone.

"Seriously, Liv? Bringing my soon to be ex-wife back as an asset?"

"I don't know why you are so upset."

"You don't want her here anymore than I do."

"Says who? I like Mellie."

"Bullshit."

"Besides Mellie being a great political asset, I need her here to keep me away from you."

"What?"

"I cannot concentrate on doing my job when you are so easily accessible! With Mellie here it gives me a better reason to remember my place."

"Your place is with me." He lowered his voice to a harsh whisper, doing his best to keep his anger from taking control.

"Until those papers are signed she is still your wife and you still belong to her. I have no claim to you whatsoever." He could see the sadness in her eyes at the realization of her statement.

"Livvie—"

"Alright, she will be at the stop by the time we arrive!" Cyrus came back stalling the conversation. He looked between the two, the tension evident. "Whats wrong?"

"Nothing." They said in sync. Cyrus took his place next to Olivia and made a few more calls. They remained silent. Fitz watched her but she refused to return his gaze. He could never understand this woman that he loved. One second, like last night, she would so outwardly profess her love and support for him the next she would reject him. This situation wasn't easy for either of them and the odds were clearly not in their favor, but Fitz was a man of faith. He believed in their love and future completely. Why couldn't she?


	5. Chapter 5

Olivia couldn't help but watch him from across the lawn as he mingled with his excited supporters. Fitz looked so happy when he was able to spend time with the people working on the front lines for him. The variance in ages, gender, republicans and democrats all here because they thought he was the best fit. She could see the brightness in his face; the people made him feel like he was worth something. They gave him a worth that even Olivia herself couldn't give him. She knew in her heart that she would sell her soul to get that man in the White House. No matter what he told her, she knew not winning would break him.

Fitz spotted her staring and began to walk over. She felt nervous as he got closer since they haven't really talked in the last couple of days. He was mad at her for bringing Mellie back but his cold shoulder was a weak one; he still called her every night. Olivia was refusing his calls and refusing to speak further on their conversation on the bus. She didn't want to delve into her reasoning or her wish-washy behavior. She was so confused when it came to him. She has never loved anything the way she loves that man and she had no clue what to do with her feelings. She wanted to be open with him, but that came with too much risk. Olivia took huge pride in her professionalism and ability to remain detached. He came and changed everything.

"Livvie." Fitz said to her when he was by her side. She took a deep breath and captured his strong scent. Her body instantly longed for his arms.

"Governor."

"Are you finally ready to talk to me?"

"About?"

"You know what." They both turned to watch Mellie on the other side of the lawn mingling with the press. She was a natural and neither of them could deny that having her back was doing wonders for his approval rating. They seemed to soar overnight after the first rally in Charlotte. He was officially back in this race, nearly taking the lead. Fitz could deny his need for Mellie all day, but he needed her, now more than ever.

"I have no intentions of speaking with you unless it is about the campaign."

"Jesus Christ, Olivia! Stop treating me like some eager loser who has a lusty crush on you!"

"I think those words describe the situation perfectly." She could feel him shaking next to her, his anger boiling inside him with no opportunity of release. This was killing her.

"You know better." He spat under his breath. She did know better, but her feelings could no longer matter.

"I have less than two months to win you this election. Don't you think that is more important than throwing it all away for a few minutes alone in a conference room?" He turned to face her, the facade that they were simply having a casual conversation broken. She kept her eyes forward but he walked into her line of sight as a result.

"Look at me." She shut her eyes. "Olivia."

"Governor Grant, we are at a political rally in front of supporters and _cameras_. You are way to close to me."

"I will continue to get in your face until you look at me. Sweet baby—"

"Don't call me that!" She stormed out of his reach and towards the refreshment tent. The day was already humid and hot and the conversation only increased her body temperature. That name...when he called her that she lost all her brain functioning. Those words made her feel infinite, like she was the world. It frightened her and made her feel weak.

She grabbed a water out of the cooler staring at it briefly hoping it would turn to wine.

"Olivia?" Cyrus was standing behind her a worn expression on his face.

"Yes?"

"Can I talk to you?" She nodded and followed him out the tent to the parking lot where the bus was parked.

"What is it?" He was staring at her face and she couldn't help but feel like a young child about to get reprimanded for stealing cookies before dinner.

"I have had my suspicions but I always told myself 'no, Olivia would never. I taught her better. She _knows_ better'. Yet here we are."

"Cy, what are you—"

"_You_ do not get to speak here. I talk, you listen." Olivia took a nervous sip from her water and prepared for her lashings.

"You were my brightest student, so eager and hungry to learn and do whatever it took to reach the next plane. Your dedication to your work was the likes which I had never seen in anyone since, well, myself. There is never room for emotions, only hard work and a whatever it takes attitude. That is why I brought you onto this campaign, because you are the only person in the world who has the gall to get Fitz into office. The only person who could take this failure and turn it into a victory and have no problem taking the credit for it because you know how brilliant you are. So, I pushed the suspicions away because you would never fall for a client." Olivia's grip on the water bottle tightened as his argument came full circle.

"Olivia Pope would never hide her _married_ lover in the closet when I come to visit her room at one in the morning. And if she did, she would have the decency to at least wait for me to walk away from the door to start fucking him!" She dropped her head in shame and disbelief, her actions sounding horrid coming from her mentor. "Are you out of your fucking mind? Do you have any idea the repercussions? What could happen if this got out?"

"It won't get out."

"Says who? The monsters come out at night, Liv. Waiting to sneak around when its dark out will only draw the lurkers closer!"

"I put the brakes on it." He let out a cynical laugh which made her feel smaller than she already did.

"Really? That moment on the hill is what you call putting the brakes on?"

"I am handling it, Cyrus."

"You lost your privilege to handle this when you were stupid enough to get caught. I am telling you to end it."

"Its not that simple."

"That wasn't a suggestion! You need to—oh my god." Cyrus could still read her mind; he could see the fear of imagining a life without Fitz run across her face. "You love him."

"Cyrus—"

"You were foolish enough to fall in love with a married man. Well, this is just great." He made loving Fitz sound like an abomination and she hated it. She hated how Cyrus could so easily make her feel worthless, how simple it was for him to twist her once meaningful words into something trivial. He was like a father to her, possessing all the negative qualities of her biological father yet the positives he lacked. "You think this is going to end well? Like a fairytale? He leaves his wife and you two ride off to 1600 Penn and live the perfect life adored by the country? Wake-up, Olivia, that is _not_ going to happen. You know how this works, this is your job. A few minutes in an empty stairwell or sneaking into a hotel room every few days does not equate to love. You know better! That man has the potential to be the greatest to ever sit at the Resolute. He can actually help people. He isn't a political snake like the rest of us, and thats what this country needs. The country needs him, Liv."

Olivia was fighting back tears, the harsh honesty of his words biting away at her resolve. She had fooled herself into believing what she had with Fitz could be something, _was_ something. She was being extremely selfish. She never placed her wants before the greater good of others until Fitz. Olivia blindly believed in this country and the things it could do because it had helped her at her lowest. She believed that Fitz could take the land she so dearly loved to a new place. She believed in that man.

"I will handle it."

"Oh, you better handle it. Or I will."

* * *

"That was a nice day." Mellie said as she settled into the opposing corner of the elevator. They made three rally stops today and everyone was beyond exhausted. Fitz was still running high off the day, the supporters giving him an innate energy that he was refusing to let run out.

"It was. I love meeting the people. So kind and honest." Their rooms were on floor 20 and 24. The elevator seemed to be moving slow and the awkwardness of the ride was making them both uncomfortable.

"It was nice...working as a team again. I really have missed that." Fitz groaned.

"Mellie, don't—"

"Just hear me out!" She pushed the emergency button, causing the elevator to pull to a sudden halt. "I know you don't believe me when I say this, but I really do love you! We work so well together and there is no denying that our union makes people happy, including me! We can work this out. We always have." For the first time she actually looked completely sincere. It was in her eyes and her body that she believed her words.

"Mellie, listen." He closed the space between them and took her hands. "You will always have a place in my heart and yes, we do make a great team, there is no denying that. But this decision is deeper than that. I don't want to live the rest of my life with just getting by. I want to wake up every morning and _feel_ something. I don't want to spend the rest of my life having to fix the same problems over and over again. You deserve better than that. We both do."

"You hate me."

"I don't hate you! I will admit, I did for awhile. But I needed time to figure everything out. Time to realize that you are not completely to blame for this marriage falling apart. Yeah, you pushed me, sometimes to the point where it was ridiculous, but I refused to try anymore. I gave up on us."

"So lets work on us!"

"We aren't those people anymore. We could never go back to the way we used to be." In all his years of knowing her, Fitz had never seen Mellie so vulnerable. She turned away from him and turned the elevator back on. They stood in silence, pondering what emotions to feel. Fitz had no idea how to handle the conversation they just had. Mellie exited quietly when they reached her floor and he felt the urge to go after her as the doors slid shut. He banged his head on the wall in frustration.

When he reached his floor the doors opened to a surprise.

"Olivia?" She was standing, waiting for the elevator, her suitcases waiting by her side. She looked shocked but quickly hid it.

"Governor Grant."

"What are you doing?"

"Getting on the elevator."

"With your bags? Isn't this your floor?"

"Where I am going is none of your concern."

"Liv—"

"Are you going to move so I can get on the elevator?"

"Not until you tell me whats going on."

"Fine, I'll take the stairs." She reached for the handle of her suitcase and he gave in.

"Alright!" He stepped off and she took his place quickly. "Where are you going?"

"Goodbye Governor Grant." The sadness on her face confused him, but it all became clear as the doors shut.

She was leaving.

She was leaving him.

"Shit!" He pushed the down button frantically but he knew waiting would do him no favors. He ran to the staircase and jumped down the steps three at a time. How he was going to to jump down twenty-four flights of stairs was beyond him, but he knew he had no choice. He was exhausted, his chances of keeping up a fitness regimen while on the trail was nearly impossible and he was feeling the effects of it. He burst into the hotel lobby and searched frantically for those bouncing curls and eye catching walk. He spotted her by the door, Cyrus stopping her briefly.

"Olivia!" He shouted and began to run to them. "Why?"

"Governor, lower your voice. This is extremely inappropriate!"

"Do not tell me what is and is not appropriate. You work for me. So tell me why."

"Fitz, she is going to the campaign headquarters in D.C. To hold the fort until the election is over." Cyrus answered for her.

"I can be of more use there." She didn't believe her own words. Fitz grabbed her arm and began to lead her away.

"Fitz, stop it!" Cyrus seethed but he ignored him. He led her past the receptionist desk and out to the courtyard in the back of the hotel. It was late so no one was around, but he lead her to the deepest point near a fountain for safety.

"Let me go!"

"Why?"

"Cyrus just told you why."

"I don't believe that and neither do you. Why are you running from me?" He pulled her to his chest and pressed his lips to her forehead.

"Sweet baby—"

"That! That is why I am leaving!" She pushed him away and he was instantly hurt. "I can't be your _sweet baby_ anymore! I can't be your secret!"

"Olivia, you are not a secret! I love you!"

"No one else knows. You can't tell anyone about me and I can't tell anyone about you. That makes whatever this fucked up thing is a secret."

"I am more than willing to tell the world about us and what you mean to me. Just say the word and I will do it."

"Cyrus knows." He could feel his eyes growing wide with shock.

"What?"

"Yeah when you were hiding in my closet and making all that fucking noise? He read between the lines." He took a moment to process the information. Cyrus could help them! He loved them both like his own and wanted what was best for them. He could help them figure out a plan.

"Well, its only Cyrus. He won't tell anyone."

"You are completely missing the point! How long before someone else figures it out, huh? You are _married_ and running for _president_. There is no possible scenario where this ends with us together."

"Stop it! I am in the process of getting a divorce! Just a little time and—"

"And what? You carry me across the threshold to the white house? Really, Fitz? Stolen moments are not love. Whatever this is...it isn't viable. This isn't love. This is two people who got really horny on a long road trip. Go back to your wife. This was a mistake." The hurt and fear on her face wasn't sitting with him at all. He knew that look, the combination of conflicting emotions. That was a haze he had lived with his entire life. It was finally becoming clear: her holding back from him and refusal to let him really know her.

"Who hurt you?"

"Excuse me?"

"Someone hurt you. I don't know when or the situation, but someone hurt you so deeply that you can't allow yourself to be with me completely."

"Just wait a minute—"

"Don't try to lie to me, Liv. I know this. Jerry was that person to me. He crippled me, made me feel worthless. Made me believe the world was out to get me and that no one would ever want me. I have trust issues to this _day_ because of what that man did to me. I know you are lying to me because I have lived it."

"You are out of line, Governor!"

"Am I? Olivia, you know more about me than anyone in the world. But I know literally nothing about you. Sure, I know your personality and quirks, which is probably more than anyone else knows, but I don't know _you_. Your childhood or favorite color or favorite movie. These are things people involved talk about! Let me in!"

"Those things are irrelevant." He could sense her discomfort; he was hitting her where it hurt. They never had this discussion about their parents and the lasting effects on their lives. She knew the basics about Jerry, but he was never willing to go into detail. This was a conversation they needed to have, one he was now more than willing.

"No! Those things matter because they make up who you are! I want to know these things! You can tell me anything!"

"Stop acting like you know me because you don't!"  
"Because you won't _let me_!"

"Because that would be inappropriate." Her constant refusal finally broke him. He had enough. Enough of trying to fight his way into her heart when she so easily walked into his.

"You know what? Fine. Leave." Her large eyes doubled in size.

"What?"

"You want to go, then leave! I am so done with this, Olivia! You don't want this! You never wanted this."

"Who would want to be a married man's whore?"

"No! You don't want me or love or anything that could make you remotely happy!"

"I never once said that!"

"You don't have to. Your actions speak volumes. I get it now. You are too much of a coward to fight for this. To fight for us. So go. Run away from this just like you have run away from everything that has had some meaning in your life." She was stunned and hurt by his words, but she saw all the truth in them. Fitz left the fixer speechless. He turned and began to walk away, his anguish growing with each step. He just willingly told the love of his life to leave and he was breaking.

"Fitz! Do not walk away!" She yelled to him. He just kept on moving. "Stop. Walking!" The break in her voice stopped him in his tracks. He could hear her heavy breathing and he waited. He waited for her to run to him, to apologize or open up or tell him she was going to stay. But he got nothing. Fitz received thirty seconds of silent daggers stabbing at his soul. He left the courtyard and went back to his room, storming past a furious Cyrus during his travel. He didn't even bother to undress when he got back to his room, just fell on his bed and watched the ceiling. His heart couldn't take her limbo anymore. The on and off was pushing him to the brink, and he knew he deserved better. Fitz deserved better than constantly waiting for her when she was never waiting for him.

But waiting for Olivia Pope was better than not having her at all.

So Fitz lay wide awake the entire night, waiting for her to call, to knock on his door, to leave his mind. He thought he was finished waiting, but the moment she entered his life, his days of waiting were destined to never end.

* * *

**A/N: Things are a little rough right now. :O Had to throw some angst in there. Hopefully will post another chapter sometime next week! **


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: Happy easter and spring break to all! This is a long one but I hope it clears some stuff up. Its not one of of my favs, but I hope y'all enjoy it. I'm going out of town this week so I won't have anything up for a few days so I hope the length of this makes up for my impending absence! (o':**

* * *

Olivia swirled around in her chair at her desk, boredom surging through her. The office was so quiet compared to the hustle and bustle of being out on the trail. Everyone had left for lunch and she didn't have the patience to be social today. She was irritated at life right now. She had a plan for her life and everything was veering off course. Olivia had been in D.C. For a week and the monotony of her days killed her: phone calls to homes to remind people to give their vote to Grant-Langston, creating schedules and routes for volunteers to hand out stickers and signs, making fresh pots of coffee every hour... She missed the wild life of three press stops in a day, the annoying journalist and media constantly in her face, organizing fundraisers and schmoozing big name donors, the late night pow-wow's with the team after a long but successful day. Most of all, she missed hearing his voice and seeing his face in person. She missed the sound of his light breathing on the other end of the phone. She missed her Fitz.

This break was real and she knew it, because unlike their past fights, there was no reconciliation. There was always a moment that would come where he would start calling her again and after a few attempts she would answer. This time there was nothing. Nine whole days without any contact with him and she literally felt like dying. They were over and it was killing her because she knew it was her fault. He finally saw over her Chinese wall and had no intentions of scaling to the other side. He did the one thing he promised her he never would; he walked away. And she had no right to even feel hurt by it, because she brought it upon herself. Olivia had no idea how to love that man, and she wanted him so badly. There was no doubt in her mind that he would take every imperfection of her and love it, but she was so afraid. She was raised to believe that everything in life is temporary. Olivia lived her entire life detached because eventually, everything comes to an end. She found it extremely difficult to detach herself from Fitzgerald Thomas Grant III, because that man made her _feel_. She didn't want her time with him to be temporary, but eternal. In this life and whatever came after air stopped pumping into her lungs, she would want him. She needed to go back to the source of her issues. She picked up her phone and dialed a number.

"Hey Huck? Yeah, its Olivia Pope. Remember when I said I would call you when I needed a favor? Yeah, now is that time. How quickly can you get me a plane to Chicago?"

* * *

Fitzgerald stared at his phone laying on the table next to Cyrus from across the room. He was searching for his Jedi powers to will the phone to ring with her number illuminating from the screen. He quickly remembered that he was a man well in his forty's and childlike imagination would do nothing for him. His entire being yearned for any resemblance of her: the sound of heels clicking down hallways, dark curls bouncing with wild precision, a sweet yet commanding voice relaying courses of action one would never dare to question. Their relationship was on a legitimate break and it was a struggle. The election was heading into debate season and all he could think about was how desperately he missed Olivia. The change in his demeanor since she left him that night was obvious to the entire team. The gossip was heavy, many accounting it to Mellie's presence. The rumors were making rounds through the gossip blogs which only proved Olivia's point that the walls, ceilings and fucking air had ears. Cyrus never came to Fitz about the Olivia situation and by the looks of it had no intention too. Fitz would catch him glaring at him with disappointment and shame, something he knew he did not deserve. How could no one understand that he just wanted to be there for this broken woman? That he was madly in love with her and wanted her to be happy? He cursed his optimistic view on life and naivety. How foolish was he to think he could actually have something as blissful as Olivia completely? When has anything like that been an option in his life? It was becoming starkly clear that he could not have Olivia and the presidency. With the rumors of Mellie being the cause of his sudden melancholy, the suspicions were beginning to rise about how cordially they truly were. The People are smart and once the seed is planted, it won't take long for them to figure out the fable and paint him as a liar. He looked at Mellie who was actively listening to the conversation going on in the meeting. Her blue eyes were sparkling with the stimulation of the topic and he felt his heart soften. Could he take everything back? There was a time when she was his world, so who is he to say that he couldn't go back in time and reconquer what was once his? Twenty years is a long time, and if he could do it before why couldn't he keep going? What was he thinking? He wanted to run the country and that required dedication. He understood now why their marriage was such a big deal; how could he dedicate himself to the country if he couldn't dedicate himself to things in his personal life? A few days ago Fitz was so sure about how everything was going to be in his life, and now everything was fucked up.

"Alright, everyone take a break. The governor and I need the room." Fitz finally snapped back to the meeting and watched in confusion as his staff and Mellie exited the hotel room. Cyrus watched him for a moment, gathering his words.

"Is this going to be a problem?"

"What?"

"Olivia Pope. Is she going to be a problem?"

"I don't know what you are talking about, Cy." Fitz got up and grabbed his phone. His heart broke when he had yet again received no messages from her.

"You have been walking around like a sullen puppy since she left and it is not doing you any favors. The staff assumes its Mellie, but we both know the truth. Mellie herself has come to me with questions. I don't understand how you let this happen."

"Cyrus, the vague nature of your statements are getting annoying."

"How could you let yourself fall into bed with her? A man of morals, a man who wants to become president, a man who wants to be nothing like his cheapskate of a father should know better!"

"Now you hold on! Do _not_ compare my being with Olivia with my father's multiple affairs. Jerry was an asshole who chased after whatever had breast and legs. He degraded those women, made them feel worthless all the while having his son nearby so he could see it all. Its amazing that I managed to grow up with an accurate idea on how to treat a woman."

"So cheating on your wife, which as you just stated is an act that your father indulged in frequently, is you treating women right?"

"I am in love with her." Cyrus groaned. "Make noises all you like but this is the truth! Never in my twenty years of being with Mellie have I gone astray, which she cannot attest to because we all know she had her flings. Plenty of women were willing and there were times when I thought I could but I never did. I couldn't be _him._ When I met Olivia, something inside of me shifted. The moment I laid eyes on her I wanted to touch her, to have her close to me and tell her everything. She makes me feel things I never even knew were possible for a person to feel. I want—no I _need_ her in my life. So no, you do not get to compare me to Jerry. You do not get to denounce Olivia as some whore because she is farthest from that. That woman saved my life." Saying everything he really felt out loud made it all abundantly clear that there was no going back for him. He could never go back to his life with Mellie, because Olivia was his life. Everything before her was simply growing up; waiting for his life to truly begin.

"You are out of your mind!"

"Maybe so." Cyrus was parading around the room, his rage taking physical control of his body. Fitz just watched him, amused. He never thought something like this would bother Cyrus so much. "You're mad because your girl, the girl you hired to save me, fell in love with me."

"I am upset because you both should know better! This entire campaign can come down in flames if anyone so much jokes about you having an affair! Do you not understand this?"

"I am well aware."

"This is so beneath you, Fitz! Leaving a happy marriage to be with your mistress?" A laugh escaped from Fitz.

"Cyrus, you know I was not happy in that marriage. The avoiding each other, the arguing, the lack of communication? No one needs to live like that! I made the decision to divorce Mellie on my own accord. Olivia had nothing to do with the decision. She was angry with me when I announced it."

"You honestly expect me to believe that after twenty years, all of sudden everything became crystal fucking clear? I know you, Fitz. You don't make decisions like that by yourself!"

"And that is the problem! I heard what you said when you were in her room that night. I know that you think I am weak and naïve and unable to do things by myself. But that is all changing, starting with my marriage. This divorce is happening with or without Olivia." Cyrus was studying him, the seriousness of Fitz's demeanor evident.

"So whats your plan? After you are happily divorced and president of this great land. What do you plan to do? I assume it is to marry Olivia, yes? Make her your first lady? Fitz, as much as I love Olivia and trust me I adore her, she isn't exactly the first lady the nation is looking for."

"Are you really going to bring race up, Cy? That is so beneath you!"

"Is it? Or am I just seeing the truth that you so blatantly want to ignore?"

"I don't really care what the country thinks. When it comes to my personal life, the country does not get a ballot to vote! I will do whatever I need to do to ensure Olivia is right with me every step of the way." Cyrus sighed loudly as sat down across from Fitz.

"You really are serious."

"Yes!"

Cyrus thought for a moment, his mind clearly weary from the battle he knew he would never win.

"Alright then. I am with you."

"Really?"

"I follow you into the shadows. You are God and I merely your disciple. Regardless of how I feel, it is your life and I can't guide you on that front. Even if it will more than likely tank your political career."

"You said that about the divorce and look where we are. Have a little faith in me, Cy."

"I do, Governor. You have no idea how much faith I have in you. I'll call her tonight and have her meet us at the first debate at Georgetown."

"Cyrus?"

"Yes?"

"I have to ask you this because you know more about her than anyone...What happened to her? She's so reserved sometimes and she refuses to open up with me. I want her to be honest with me but she just fights me."

"That is something that I am not at liberty to discuss." Fitz sighed. He knew Cyrus wouldn't tell him. "I will say that she had a rough childhood and had to fight for everything she has. She doesn't know how to turn that fighter mode off. If anyone can break through, its you."

Fitz held onto these words and thought about them as the meeting resumed. Before he carried on with Olivia they needed to have a conversation. Her demons were keeping her from him, and until they were out in the open, they could never truly be happy. But how could he break through?

* * *

This was not Olivia's first rodeo, but she felt so completely uncomfortable as she awaited the large steel door to open. The loud buzz allowing her entry to the visiting area made her jump out of her Jimmy Choo's. She walked down to phone number thirteen, their usual. She checked her watch for the time; 2:30 on the dot. Whenever she felt brave enough to visit he was always late. Maybe it was his way of punishing her for not visiting enough. Maybe it was simply because he was a jerk who only cared about himself. She assumed it was the latter. Her attention jumped from her phone when the doors opened behind the glass and her father sat down in front of her. He looked the same, save a bit more muscle. His blue jumpsuit made her chuckle internally; it was the same blue as the uniform he once wore with wrongful pride. He smiled at his daughter. He picked up the receiver and waited patiently as his daughter wiped hers clean with a soft-n-wet.

"You are so much like your mother, you know that?" His thick bass of a voice instantly made her feel like a helpless child again.

"I wouldn't know. Never met her."

"Well, with good reason. I'm surprised you came. Been about ten years."

"Yeah, I've been busy."

"Too busy to visit your own father?"

"Yes."

"Well, why now?"

"I needed to talk to you."

"About?" The dark eyes she inherited were piercing into her soul, making her forget everything she had planned to say. The power he had over her was frightening, even after all these years.

"Kevin, after all these years I just let it go. I never prodded or questioned because you were _god_. I held you up so high and you came crashing down. You never told me why."

"Told you?"

"Why did you do it?"

"Olivia, that was twenty years ago."

"Time doesn't change anything."

"It does. It means I do not want to talk about it."

"Well, I do!"

"You are the child and I am the adult!"

"It doesn't work that way anymore, Kevin! I am thirty-three years old and I deserve to be treated like an adult! You do not get to parade around here like the responsible parent anymore. Not after what you did." He sighed deeply, clearly annoyed by his daughter.

"Olivia—"

"You lied to me! My entire life I thought you were the greatest. You treated me like a princess and yet you always managed to hold me down. Buy me whatever toys I wanted then turn around and tell me to never trust others. That you were the only friend I could ever have because you were the only person in the world who cared about me. I had no friends, I had no family because of you! And I just accepted it because you were God and you always taught me that God was always right even when he made mistakes. Imagine how shocked thirteen year old Olivia was when she comes home to half the squad cars surrounding our house. I thought it was some meeting or something, seeing as you were Chief of Police. Instead I get off the bus from school and there you are being walked out of the house in hand cuffs. The news was so wild that day: Chief of Police Kevin Wallace arrested on charges of corruption, murder and drug trafficking. My father the drug dealer. My father, the most hated man in all of Chicago.

"Do you have any idea what that was like for me? Defending you to the kids at school, bullied because my dad was a corrupt maniac who ran an underground drug ring? I had to tell them that you were a good man and good men make silly mistakes. Silly mistakes! I was ridiculed! I was already a loser since I had no friends. I was the weird girl who was really smart and refused to make friends with anything other than a book. They beat me up because of you, and what did you do? Nothing. No explanations. No phone calls. Nothing. I got to see you on tv during your trial and that was it. They shipped me off to live with the grandmother in D.C. I didn't even know existed and I had to pick up the pieces. I had to fix my life because you _demolished _it.

"And you know what? It felt good. Taking charge of my life and making it worth something. And I made the conscious decision to fix other peoples lives too, because it seemed like I was good at it. I was good at something that didn't involve you and it felt so damn good! Changing my last name to that of the mother who I know without a doubt was a brilliant and loving woman. A woman that you kept from me. I know she died having me but I deserve to know who she was! She _lives_ in me and I never even knew her name until I moved in with gramgram. That killed me! But I pushed through it all. Working my way through college and graduating top of my class. All by myself. I fixed _myself_!"

"Then why are you here." His expression was less than amused. It was like he had tuned her out the entire time. Like a child going off on a tangent about the meaningless events of their day. "If you have created such a great life for yourself why are you here? To rub it in? To make me feel like failure? What is it, Olivia?"

"It's him." The confidence she felt while chewing him out vanished suddenly at the thought of the love of her life. Like her father, that man had such an unexplainable hold over her.

"What?"

"I love _him_." She felt her eyes blur with tears. "I love this man and I don't know how to open up to him because of _you_. _You_ ruined me, daddy. I want him so fucking bad and I don't know how to let him in because no matter how hard I tried to fix myself, there is one spot that I can't erase you from. My heart." She was waiting for his expression to flip and she got nothing. "I hate you! But I can't erase you from me. I can never erase that trust and that bond we had. You were all I had."

"Sweet baby—"

"Don't. Please, do not call me that. I...I am not your sweet baby. Not anymore." She shut her eyes as the tears escaped. She only wanted to hear Fitz call her that precious name. She had always wondered how Fitz managed to give her that name, of all the names in the world. _Sweet baby_. He gave it a new life. When he whispered it in her ear the first night they made love she almost broke down in tears and ran. But his soft embrace and loving gaze aroused something old inside her: that trust and comfort she hadn't felt since she was an ignorant child. But this time it was tangible, honest and ethereal.

"I don't know what you want from me."

"I want you to let me go. I want you to tell me how to let you go so I can move on. I cannot have him with you in my head."

"Olivia, I cannot tell you how to do that. The problem isn't me. Its you. I know I hurt you and I made decisions that were not the best. But I did them for you. To give you a life I had no other way to give without those decisions. Why fill your head with stupid details about a woman you would never know? Why talk about someone that left _us? _I raised you to the best of my ability and I like to think maybe I didn't do such an awful job. I raised you to know facts and realities. There is no room for emotion or love or dreams in this world. Dreams are for fools. You are a brilliant and successful woman. My daughter is working on the campaign of a presidential candidate! If this is what I see ten years later, I can't say I am too ashamed of what I did. God is always right even when he makes mistakes." The lack of remorse or compassion in her fathers eyes made something abundantly clear to Olivia: Her father was a bad man. The type of man that she gave her all to make sure never got away with their wrongful deeds. Olivia hated the bad guys because they hurt people. Her entire life she imagined her father as the good guy who let one really strong bad guy slip through the cracks and ruin their lives. But it was now abundantly clear at twenty years later, that he had been the bad guy all along. And bad guys had no business running any part of her life.

As Olivia left the prison and boarded her plane back to Washington, she thought about what she would say to Fitz when she saw him the next day. How could she explain her complicated past to him and make him understand? She barely understood her situation. She just knew that she had to let him in, somehow, someway. Because Fitzgerald Thomas Grant III was a _good_ man. The type of good that you only read about in fairytales and fables. The kind that Olivia tried to fix herself to be. More than that, he was the love of her life, and damn it all she would not lose him to the demon she called a father. She would not let him take her second chance.

* * *

**A/N: I hope you guys enjoyed this. A weird view on Olivia's past but it came to me and I just kind of ran with it. Leave your thoughts! I'd love to hear and again thank you_ so _ much for reading! **


	7. Preview: Chapter 7

**A/N: this chapter is sooo long and taking me forever so here is a little preview! (o: **

* * *

"Olivia." He panted as he pulled his lips embrace from hers.

"What?" She went in for his lips but he pushed her away gently.

"We...we can't."

"What?"

"We need to talk."

"Can't it wait?"

"We have waited too long already."

"Fitz—" She slipped her index fingers into the front loops of his jeans and pulled him to her, their bodies meeting with a soft thud. "I want you. I don't want to talk. Not now." His eyes were dark with desire and she knew this was a battle he could never win. Fitz rested his forehead on hers.

"Fitz—"

"No!" He broke away and walked deeper into the living room. "You always do this!"

"Do what?"

"Avoid. Every time we start to get to an open place you shut me out and use sex to make me forget."

"That is not true!"

"Olivia. I came here to talk. No more sex until we work out our issues."

"Issues? We have issues now?"

"Olivia, we are the text book definition of issues. Both of us together? Ha!" Olivia felt so ready to open up to him, but the way he acted earlier forced her back into old habits. How could she trust him with her secrets? How could she be sure he wouldn't turn on her at any moment? Or worse, go back to Mellie and leave her in the dust?

Mellie.

"You left with her."

"I know."

"Why?"

"Because she asked me too."

"Since when do you do what Mellie asks of you?"

"Since when does spending time with my wife bother you?" His words stung, his sincerity throwing her off guard.

"Why don't you go back to your wife then!"

"Thats what you wanted, isn't it? You told me to go back with her. To stop wasting my time chasing after you. You should be ecstatic."

"You know what, screw you!" She stormed to the kitchen and he was right on her heels.

"You do not get to turn this on me! This isn't about me, this is about you and your inability to be honest with me."

"This is so about you! _You_ are the one who is married! _You_ are the one who is running for president! You bring all the difficult!"

"Do not act like those are things we didn't know about from the start. When this relationship started those things were abundantly clear. This is not about the outside issues, this is about you and I. This is about _our_ damage." He was leaning on the doorframe, arms by his sides. He was an open book and had been since day one. There were aspects of his past they never touched on, this was true, but he never hid anything from her. She was the one hiding the facts of her life. Olivia was the one who was hiding from him. He deserved the same level of honesty.

"What do you want to know?"

"_What_?"

"Ask me anything and I will tell you." He grabbed his hair in frustration and turned away from her. When he turned back he had desperation on his face.

"That is not what I want!"

"I don't understand. You said you want me to be honest with you and I am trying!"

"You are missing the point! I don't want you to open up with me because you think that is what I want! I want you to _want_ to tell me! I want you to trust me enough to feel safe telling me."

"Why would I ever want to tell you about how fucked up I am?"

"You know everything about me because I trust you! Because I know you won't judge me even with all my flaws. I didn't let you in because I thought you would want that, I let you in because I _wanted_ you there."

His words were hitting her like pounds of wet cement, devouring and smothering her ability to think. His words were so clear yet confused her. This was so fucking complicated and Olivia wanted nothing more than to slip back to the uncomplicated ways of repression. But, she knew she couldn't go back. She wanted him and she knew that having him meant opening up. She did trust him, but she was scared. If he knew how damaged she was, would he still want her?


	8. Chapter 7

**A/N: It honestly feels like an eternity has passed since I have updated! Life has shoved itself in my face and kept me from writing along with a slight bought of writers block. I thought about splitting this up because it is LOOONG. But I thought since I've gone so long w/o an update, a long chapter is appropriate. I really enjoyed this chapter, I hope y'all do too! :D**

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Things were bad; really bad. Olivia was blaming herself for not being there, but she doubted her presence would have done much. The debate was rough and Fitz looked extremely unprepared. The topics of choice for the first debate were on economic policy and job growth, a topic that although very close to Fitz's heart, he wasn't the best at speaking on it. Reston was brilliant, able to balance data with personal reassurance. Olivia hadn't been there to help write his responses or go over how he should present himself. Fitz looked like a lost kid. His responses were robotic and uninspired, which shocked Olivia because she knew his passion. She could see the frustration in his eyes deepen with each question. Reston was on fire.

"Tell me when it's over!" Cyrus said turning away. They were watching from backstage. The air was thick with awkwardness and frustration.

"What is he doing? I don't understand! I was only gone for a week!"

"Yeah, well, its evident that his mind was everywhere but on the campaign while you were gone."

"What is that supposed to mean?"

"It means he can't stop thinking about _you_." His voice fell to a whisper. The disappointment that was in his eyes the last time he brought up the affair was gone this time. "It pains me to admit this, but he needs you. Hell, we all need you." Olivia smiled weakly.

"Well, I'm not going anywhere. I won't run away again."

"And I won't be foolish enough to think you leaving will solve anything. But, this isn't all you. He looks genuinely uninspired up there." Olivia turned her eyes back to Fitz, the effects of Reston's beat down playing over his face. He turned his eyes and he saw her. They held a gaze for a moment, a conglomerate of emotions running between them.

"Governor Grant, do you have a response?" He broke the gaze and went back to the debate.

"I'm sorry, could you repeat the question?"

Olivia felt butterflies form in the pit of her stomach. She had to talk to him and it had to be tonight. The longer she waited the more her chances of actually having the conversation would diminish. There was no way for her to get him alone, not without it being obvious.

"Cyrus, I need to talk to him. Alone."

"And you are telling me this, why?"

"Because I need you to help me make that happen. I know you knowing about...us, puts you in an impossible position, but—"

"Liv, you don't have to keep explaining how awkward this is for me, trust me, I know." He sighed deeply and ran his fingers through his already distressed hair. "I want to help. Something about you two...its undeniable. I of all people should know about forbidden love." His eyes took on a darkness for a moment and Olivia immediately picked up on his words.

"Are things alright between you and James?" He shrugged.

"He doesn't like being treated like a dirty little secret." Olivia scoffed.

"Yeah, its not too fun." They looked at each other and laughed. It was...nice, having someone to talk too. The situation never seemed funny to Olivia, but in retrospect, it really was. "Who would have thought, the campaign fixer and her mentor trapped in Shakespearean love quarrels."

"Its rather sad, don't you think?"

"Extremely." They turned their attention back to the debate which was winding down in time but not in brutality. Reston was a monster out there and he knew it. The smug smile on his face after each brilliant response and snarky comment thrown at Fitz was unbearable.

"I'll give him the day off tomorrow. We need to regroup anyway, and it will probably be easier without him there to set up a new game plan."

"Thats a little risky, don't you think?"

"He will sit there and just complain and sulk. I can't be bothered. Your timing is actually perfect. Use it wisely." The candidates gave their final remarks and the crowd applauded as Reston brought his family on stage. Fitz waited patiently and greeted them, no family of his own to bring out. He caught Olivia's eye again, anger devouring his.

"Bring me my candidate back." Cyrus whispered in her ear quickly as Fitz met them on the side.

"Olivia." He said plainly. He didn't seem excited to see her. Who could blame him after their last conversation?

She wanted to hold him in her arms and tell him everything would be alright.

"Governor."

"I'm going to find Mellie." Cyrus winked at Olivia and walked away.

"Fancy you meeting us here."

"I couldn't stay away. It seems you need me more than you let on."

"I never denied how much I needed you." His voice was harsh. She tried to brush it off as the aftereffects of the debate, but she knew he was genuinely upset with her.

"We need to talk."

"Theres nothing left to say."

"There is _everything_ left to say." He grabbed her arm and led her out into the empty hallway that led to the auditorium. "Not here."

"And where do you expect us to speak, Olivia? Wouldn't it be a bit suspicious if we snuck off somewhere?"

"I know but...we can't do this here." He leaned against the wall and watched her. His gaze made her uncomfortable, the fire in his stare arousing and placing fear in her all at the same time. "Come to my place." He cocked his eyebrow.

"How am I supposed to get to your apartment without raising suspicion?"

"I don't know." It was the first place that came to mind. It was safer than the hotel and she knew they could be uninterrupted there.

"Cyrus would never allow it."

"Don't be so sure."

"Olivia—"

"There you are!" Mellie came through the door and watched the couple intently. "Everything alright?"

"Oh, yeah! I was just giving Fitz a little pep talk."

"Well, that was nice of you, Olivia." She smiled at her but Olivia could see the resentment deep in Mellie's eyes. "Fitz, the car is here. I thought we could ride back together." Fitz kept his eyes on Olivia.

"I'll be right there."

"Don't take too long! We can talk about the debate in the car." Mellie exited leaving more tension in the air. Olivia felt so small. She wasn't expecting Fitz to act like this.

"Are you going with her?"

"So what if I do?"

"Why are you being so cold?"

"How can I not be?" He was in her face now. "You left me and I waited for you to come back. To call. To do _something_. And once again you left me waiting. I'm done waiting." He left Olivia standing there dumbfounded. She expected him to jump at her offer to open up to him. She was too late. Olivia Pope had herself in a situation that she couldn't fix.

"Good job, Olivia." She said out loud. She didn't fight for him and now she had lost him. Or was she still refusing to fight? Maybe this was his entire point, she was still refusing to fight for him. That night in the courtyard when she told him to stop walking and she just stared at him... She was speechless, unsure of what to say. She wanted to tell him to stay, to profess everything she felt, but she didn't know how. Olivia had no clue how to lay it all bare. She had moats and walls protecting her castle of emotions and had no clue how to let people cross the bridge to get inside. It had to start right now. Fitz was constantly chasing after her, but she never him. It was her turn.

Olivia sprinted into the auditorium, no one left but crew cleaning up the debate set. She ran to the lobby, still filled with media and attendees. She didn't see Fitz or Mellie anywhere, and she prayed she wasn't too late as she pushed past the people to get outside. Her eyes searched the myriad of parked cars. She didn't see him anywhere. She looked six cars down to her left one last time, and she recognized the form bending down helping someone into the parked SUV. Olivia took a few steps towards the vehicle but stopped when he looked up and saw her. He was leaning on the open door slightly. She took a deep breath and slowly made her way over. This was it. This was Olivia fighting.

She was about ten feet away when he turned his back on her and stepped into the vehicle. She stopped dead in tracks as if she was being held at gun point. He just got in the car with Mellie and left her on the sidewalk. She watched as the car drove away. Is this what it felt like, being ditched by the one who is supposed to love you? Olivia made a vow after her father left her to never feel this abandonment again, but like clockwork Fitz managed to sneak past and make her feel.

* * *

Mellie was talking the entire drive but Fitz couldn't bring himself to listen. He felt like such a failure. He bombed the debate and this would result in him dropping significantly in the polls. Fitz couldn't figure out what happened, he just lost it. Debates were nothing he wasn't used too, he had done them a thousand times in his career. But something was lost for him tonight; the fire wasn't there. The entire time on the podium he was trying to figure out why he was there, how he had gotten this far. He found himself questioning everything a lot these days since his fight with Olivia.

Oh, Olivia.

He knew she would be there, but seeing her made everything come back. He thought he would be overjoyed to see and speak to her, but he immediately felt angry. Angry that she just left him and didn't bother to call. A lot of things needed to change if they intended to keep this relationship going. He couldn't keep chasing after her and constantly having to do all the fighting. Olivia was going to have to meet him halfway, and it didn't seem like that would be happening anytime soon.

"Fitz, honey, we're here." He snapped out of his thoughts and followed Mellie out the car and into the hotel lobby. He hadn't heard a word she said the entire drive.

"Fitz, are you alright?" Mellie placed her hand on his shoulder and watched him with caring eyes. She had been so attentive to him since Olivia left and as thankful as he was to see this softer side of her, he was no fool. He knew she was trying to sneak her way back into his life and as appealing as she was making it, he knew better.

"I'm fine. Just have a lot on mind."

"You weren't as bad as you think, you know. Don't be so hard on yourself. We move forward and work towards the next debate!" He smiled at her.

"Thanks, Mel." He pulled her in for a hug but she moved so that their lips met. Fitz was shocked and didn't realize what was happening until he felt the surprised gazes of people in the lobby. He pulled away quickly and wiped his lips.

"What the hell was that?" She had a coy smile on her lips.

"It was a kiss, silly."

"Mellie, you cannot kiss me in public!"

"Why not? I'm your wife."

"We both know why. Look, we are not getting back together. It wouldn't be good for either of us."

'"We both know how beneficial this would be for us. After tonight you are going to need every boost you can get and you won't get it from anywhere else. I am your ticket to the White House!"

"I don't need lies to get me into the presidency. I will get there by the people and by them only! No tricks!"

"Fitz, why do you do this? Always taking the hard road?"

"Because doing the right thing is never easy. I have lived easy and its not all its cracked up to be." He closed his eyes for a moment and saw Olivia, his complicated love. Nothing about loving her was remotely easy, it was devastating and painful, but always worth it. Every moment with her was worth the pain and heartache.

"Running this country will not be any easier if I take the simple route to it. I need to work for this because every moment of my time in office will be a challenge. I need to deserve the respect of the American people and I can't do that if I lie to them."

"Why do I get the feeling you aren't just talking about the campaign anymore?" She was searching his face for a tell and he prayed that he hadn't given himself away. She took a step closer to him and lowered her voice. "There is someone else, isn't there?" Fitz wanted to be honest with Mellie, she deserved that much. But, the circumstances of their divorce were too risky for complete honesty. And he had to protect Olivia.

"No."

"How hypocritical of you to say you have to be honest with the voters yet you can lie to your wife's face."

"I am not lying to you." He felt his phone vibrate in his pocket and he stepped away to check the message.

_"543, 84__th__ Street. 7__th__ floor, Apt. 113.  
Please come. I need to see you.  
~SB" _

Fitz could only concentrate on the pen name of the text. _SB; _Sweet Baby. He had no other choice but to go to her, regardless of the consequences. He was being foolish, and regardless of his anger, this was a conversation they needed to have. When he looked up from his phone, Mellie was gone. He wanted to look for her, but he knew the longer he waited to go to Olivia, the worse that situation would get.

* * *

He wasn't coming. She sent the text to him over an hour ago and he hadn't replied or called or shown up. Olivia blew her was going to die alone and unhappy, just like her father. In her own self made prison of loathing and misery. She probably deserved that. His blood was running through her veins, the blood of a villain. How could she expect to deserve happiness? She was guilty by association, born into a curse never meant to be broken. Fairytales did not exist and that is exactly what her relationship with Fitz was.

Olivia sat on her couch and watched the door, tears falling from her eyes freely as her mind sealed up the realities of her life. Her father was right, per usual. He would always be right. Love was a lie. The only thing that was real in life was disappointment. Olivia got up to lock her door, but she noticed something when her eye grazed the peep hole. There was someone coming, the object growing larger. She opened the door and there he was, his fist raised to knock. He took in her tear stained face and he immediately softened.

"Hi." He said softly. He placed his hands on the back of her neck, his thumbs rubbing circles into her cheeks as more tears fell.

"Hi." She chocked out.

It shocked her how Fitz was able to eradicate every negative thought that took hold of her with a simple word. How _"Hi"_ was more than a greeting with him, but a promise; a promise to always return. A promise that no matter how many times he would say goodbye or how many times he would leave her side, he would always come back. Always returning with more love than when he left.

Olivia pulled him down so that he met her lips, the chaste kiss quickly evolving to hot and messy. She pulled him inside, never releasing his lips. The moment he pushed the door closed she had him pinned against it, her hands snaking underneath his pull-over and polo shirt. The familiar feel of his chiseled chest sent a shiver throughout her veins, deepening her need for him.

"Olivia." He panted as he pulled his lips embrace from hers.

"What?" She went in for his lips but he pushed her away gently.

"We...we can't."

"What?"

"We need to talk."

"Can't it wait?"

"We have waited too long already."

"Fitz—" She slipped her index fingers into the front loops of his jeans and pulled him to her, their bodies meeting with a soft thud. "I want you. I don't want to talk. Not now." His eyes were dark with desire and she knew this was a battle he could never win. Fitz rested his forehead on hers.

"Fitz—"

"No!" He broke away and walked deeper into the living room. "You always do this!"

"Do what?"

"Avoid. Every time we start to get to an open place you shut me out and use sex to make me forget."

"That is not true!"

"Olivia. I came here to talk. No more sex until we work out our issues."

"Issues? We have issues now?"

"Olivia, we are the text book definition of issues. Both of us together? Ha!" Olivia felt so ready to open up to him, but the way he acted earlier forced her back into old habits. How could she trust him with her secrets? How could she be sure he wouldn't turn on her at any moment? Or worse, go back to Mellie and leave her in the dust like he did tonight?

Mellie.

"You left with her."

"I know."

"Why?"

"Because she asked me too."

"Since when do you do what Mellie asks of you?"

"Since when does spending time with my wife bother you?" His words stung, his sincerity throwing her off guard.

"Why don't you go back to your wife then!"

"Thats what you wanted, isn't it? You told me to go back with her. To stop wasting my time chasing after you. You should be ecstatic."

"You know what, screw you!" She stormed to the kitchen and he was right on her heels.

"You do not get to turn this on me! This isn't about me, this is about you and your inability to be honest with me."

"This is so about you! _You_ are the one who is married! _You_ are the one who is running for president! You bring all the difficult!"

"Do not act like those are things we didn't know about from the start. When this relationship started those things were abundantly clear. This is not about the outside issues, this is about you and I. This is about _our_ damage." He was leaning on the doorframe, arms by his sides. He was an open book and had been since day one. There were aspects of his past they never touched on, this was true, but he never hid anything from her. She was the one hiding the facts of her life. Olivia was the one who was hiding from him. He deserved the same level of honesty.

"What do you want to know?"

"_What_?"

"Ask me anything and I will tell you." He grabbed his hair in frustration and turned away from her. When he turned back he had desperation on his face.

"That is not what I want!"

"I don't understand. You said you want me to be honest with you and I am trying!"

"You are missing the point! I don't want you to open up with me because you think that is what I want! I want you to _want_ to tell me! I want you to trust me enough to feel safe telling me."

"Why would I ever want to tell you about how fucked up I am?"

"You know everything about me because I trust you! Because I know you won't judge me even with all my flaws. I didn't let you in because I thought you would want that, I let you in because I _wanted_ you there."

His words were hitting her like pounds of wet cement, devouring and smothering her ability to think. His words were so clear yet confused her. This was so fucking complicated and Olivia wanted nothing more than to slip back to the uncomplicated ways of repression. But, she knew she couldn't go back. She wanted him and she knew that having him meant opening up. She did trust him, but she was scared. If he knew how damaged she was, would he still want her?

* * *

Fitz waited patiently as the weight of his words sifted through Olivia's mind. He knew he was throwing a lot at her, but she didn't leave him with much a choice. It was clear she didn't know how to comprehend what he wanted from her. It seemed so simple to him, but he was realizing that her issues were deep as the earth's core, so deep that this was not computing. She was playing with her fingers as she slid to the floor. He waited.

"My father is in prison for a triple life sentence." Fitz thought he misheard her, but didn't dare interrupt her. Her refusal to look up made it abundantly clear that she needed to release this without interruption. "He was running an underground drug ring connected with the police department. He had people killed, directly and indirectly. My father is a criminal and a murderer but my entire life I thought he was a hero. It was just us when I was growing up since my mom died giving birth to me. I had no friends because all we needed was each other. I didn't know anything besides _him_. He was my everything and I loved him desperately. He taught me everything: never let emotions surface let alone lead your decisions. Facts and evidence are everything, never let people get close to you, for kindness is weakness.

"When he got arrested and I was sent to live with my grandmother in D.C. I was so lost. I didn't know how to breathe without him. My gram-gram was so sweet and caring and I didn't know how to handle it. My life with Kevin was cold but I loved it because it was all I knew. Gram-gram told me all about my mother and I saw how amazing she was and I started to hate him for keeping her memory from me. I slowly began to realize what he stole from me. He took my adolescence, my ability to be _normal_. I worked my entire high school life fixing my life, learning how to smile and be friendly. I made a few friends even got a boyfriend. I fixed myself and I knew I wanted to fix things for the rest of my life. I was good at it." She looked up, not staring at anything in particular. A weak smile was on her lips, her eyes filled with sadness as the memories washed over her. Her body was slumped, the usual power she held within herself completely gone. She looked so...destitute. Fitz shut his eyes and imagined a young Olivia, sweet and charming with bouncing pig tails. A sweet girl with a huge and damaged heart. The image tore him apart.

"The older I got I guess I realized I was better at fixing other people's shit than my own. No matter how hard I tried, I could never keep anyone around for long. I pushed all my boyfriends away, no one able to climb over my emotional walls. A few friends manage to stick with me and I even managed to keep Cyrus in my are very similar, Cyrus and I." He could see the resemblances: the emotional hardness and dedication to a job. "My fathers teachings never left me no matter how hard I tried to forget. My grandmothers tenderness couldn't overcome what my father did to me, and if she couldn't do it then no one could. But..." Fitz opened his eyes at the glaring silence. Her tear ridden gaze landed on him.

"Then came you." The connection between them was intensifying as her words hit him directly. "You came and changed everything. The moment I looked at you everything felt different. You were...special. You had the ability to make me feel a safety I could never find anywhere else, even in my make me feel like I have a purpose. But, I don't know how to love you. I push you away and fight you because I don't deserve you. I don't deserve the feelings you give me. I don't feel damaged when I am with you, I feel fixed...I feel complete. But I'm damaged. I will always be damaged."

Fitz walked to Olivia and kneeled in front of her. He took her fidgeting hands and brought them to his lips.

"You stop that. Look at me." Her shaking eyes met his. "Regardless of what happened in the past, he does not define you. He is not you."

"He is! He is my _father_ and he defines me."

"Our parents decisions are not our own. We make our own paths, we find our own love. I learned that the hard way. But you know who taught me that?" She shook her head. "You. Olivia, I did not know that I could be my own person until you came into my life. You make me strong, you give me wings. My whole life was spent under the shadow of my father. I spent my entire life doing everything in my power not to be him and I ended up walking down the road he paved for me. Then you came and showed me the road less traveled. You came and changed everything."

"I did?"

"You did! You deserve love! You deserve happiness and normal. We deserve each other." Fitz pulled her into his arms held her tightly as she cried. Her body heaved against his chest as her sobs left her and it shattered him to know she has been holding this inside herself for all these years. He wanted to kill that man for doing this to Olivia. Prison wasn't harsh enough, the bastard didn't deserve the right to breathe.

When her tears ended they just sat in solitude for awhile, neither wanting to break the comfort of their embrace.

"Fitz." She whispered.

"Hmmm?"

"I love you."

"I know, sweet baby, I know." He felt her grab his shirt tightly.

"My father—"

"No." He cut her off. "No more talking."

"What?" Fitz held her as he brought them from the floor and to their feet. "I thought you wanted to know everything."

"I do. But you've told me enough for tonight. You are exhausted. I'm exhausted. We're going to bed."

"Fitz—"

"Bed." He held his hand out for her to take and she didn't even hesitate to take it. Olivia lead them to her bedroom and Fitz took a moment to take in the surrounding. The room was calm and serene, the walls providing the most color, the soft crème contrasting the black and white comforter on the bed. It described her so well, her need for normal and calm after living such a hectic life. Everything about his beloved was starting to make sense and it was comforting.

"Fitz." Her voice brought him back and he was now staring at Olivia standing in front of him now just in her grey laced panties and bra. She was a vision even in her moments of distress. He shed his clothing quickly and walked around to the left side of the bed. They crawled under the covers together, Fitz's arms wrapping around her waist and pulling her to his chest instantly. Her head rested on his pectorals perfectly, like a missing puzzle piece. He planted a soft kiss on her shoulder blade, causing a contented sigh to escape her lips.

"I love you, sweet baby." He whispered to her. He felt her fingers rub circles on his knuckles.

"My father called me sweet baby." She said softly. The revelation shocked Fitz and slightly filled him with guilt. The name for her was supposed to be his; it was supposed to represent everything he felt for her. The moniker came to him the first night they made love: everything about her was home, so sweet and welcoming. She offered him everything that night: her reputation, her heart, her body and soul. She _was_ everything. And now something that was so sacred to them was tainted, and he did that unknowingly.

"I had no idea, Olivia. I—"

"No, no. Don't apologize." She turned in his arms and brought a hand to his face. "It means so much more coming from you. I _am_ your sweet baby." Fitz closed the space between them and captured her lips, kissing her softly. His hands began to explore the hills and valleys of her body, hungrily caressing and grabbing any and every ounce of flesh.

"Make love to me, Fitz." She whispered in his ear as he slipped the straps of bra down and off her shoulders. He looked into her eyes and saw the mutual hunger and need. As a couple, they had never been good with words. Everything was so natural with them, words would spoil it all. Now that they had brought them into the equation, everything was changing. But this...the hunger...this was normal for them.

As they made love under the sheets Olivia called her own, their bodies melding together into a single entity, it became clear that they had been driving themselves insane searching for a normal that did not exist. What they found in each other was greater than "normal"; they found peace.

* * *

**A/N: So they finally started to have the "talk"! I hope you guys enjoyed this and I really hope the length makes up for the absence! 9 DAYS TIL SCANDAL! YAY! **


	9. Chapter 8

**A/N: Had terrible writers block for a bit! But here it is. Hope you guys enjoy it and again thank you so much for reading. Your comments give me so much life and I feel so honored! :D **

* * *

Olivia stretched out wildly as a loud yawn escaped her body. Her face was being devoured by her pillow, the breeze from her window catching her exposed foot slightly. As she slowly came to consciousness, the events of the night before came back to her and she deduced it to a dream. It had to be a dream. Fitz being in her apartment? Fitz staying the night with her and not having to sneak away? Olivia revealing her past to him? Yeah, that was something that her dreams were made of.

When she rolled onto her side to see the disarray of sheets she decided her assumption was correct. One soft breath and she knew she was wrong; the scent of his cologne was lingering on the pillow. She grabbed it and held it to her face, sniffing it to reaffirm her senses. He had been here. So the night before was real. Olivia had no clue what to do now; he knew everything about her and stayed with her. He wanted her regardless of her damage. That was a concept she wasn't quite accustomed to.

Olivia rolled on her back and sighed deeply. Her nose picked up on a sweet smell of cinnamon. Realizing it was still dark out, she checked her watch; 4:24 am. She pulled her legs over the edge of the bed and stood up, the sweet soreness she felt coursing through her another reminder. She looked around her room for something to pull on. She was too lazy to grab pajamas from her drawer and the idea of slipping on pants seemed taxing. Her eyes met a grey t-shirt laying around Fitz's clothes. She inspected it and felt giddy when she realized it was his Navy tee. It was his favorite, one he wore whenever he wanted to get comfortable. Olivia loved it because it was something simple that always relaxed him; plus, it hugged his muscles in just the right way. She put the shirt on and hugged herself. It was like he was holding her in his strong arms.

She walked out her bedroom and followed the sweet smell and sounds of music to her kitchen. She stood in the doorway and watched: Fitz was in front of her stove flipping what looked like french toast in a skillet, shaking his ass to "Got to Give it Up". She covered her mouth with her hand to suppress her laughter, the sight in front of her was so peculiar. Fitzgerald Thomas Grant III, future president of the United States was dancing in his boxers in her kitchen. She thought about grabbing her phone and capturing the moment, but she didn't want to tear her eyes from the majestic man in front of her. It just didn't make sense that a man so amazing as Fitz could ever see something in her.

He flipped another piece of french toast, adding a spin and ending with a thrust to the stove. A giggle escaped her and he turned with an embarrassed expression on his face.

"You woke up." He turned his iphone off and ran his hands through his already messy curls. Olivia kept giggling.

"Good morning." She walked over to him and wrapped her arms around his waist. He leaned down and captured her lips in a soft kiss. This felt so right, a moment that normal couples share. It was the morning and they were together, no pressure of having to sneak back into a room or make sure no one would hear them.

"Is this what I think it is?" He turned back to the stove and she rested her head on his bare back as he cooked.

"Mhhmmm. My infamous Fitz Toast." She rolled her eyes at the corniness. He has told her many a time that he makes the best french toast in the world. He was always promising to make a batch for her one day but she always shrugged it off as impossible.

"I never thought I would get a chance to try them."

"Never say never."

"So are we just going to ignore what I just walked in on or..."

"I have no idea what you are talking about."

"Oh? So you don't remember shaking your ass to Marvin Gaye five minutes ago?"

"Baby, I think you are dreaming."

"You are just lucky I didn't record it and sent it to BNC. That would send your approval rating through the roof!" Olivia savored the rise and fall of his back as laughter coursed through him. He winked at her and turned off the stove. Olivia lifted herself on the counter and tapped the wood with her feet.

"Livvie?"

"Yeah?"

"I got a voicemail from my divorce lawyer last night. We have a meeting with Mellie and her lawyers in two days to sign the first set of paperwork."

"W-what does that mean?" Olivia knew exactly what that meant, but she wanted to hear the explanation from him.

"It means I am one giant step closer to being a free man. One step closer to being able to make you french toast every morning for the rest of our lives. Its going to take some time for the divorce to become finalized, a few months I believe they told me last time we met. But the ink will be dry on that paperwork and the separation period won't matter because there is no way I am going back."

The reality that this divorce was happening was slowly beginning to dawn on her. There would be no more sneaking around or feelings of guilt and shame. He would be free to belong to her in every sense. It was frightening but so exciting. She wanted this so desperately, but at this moment she couldn't take her eyes off the stove as her stomach growled loudly. She watched as Fitz placed two slices of french toast on a plate and gently topped them off with powdered sugar, cinnamon and a light glaze of syrup. She had never seen him cook before, and he had this natural calm about him in the kitchen. It was extremely sexy. He brought the plate over to her.

"Are you ready to have your mind and tastebuds blown?"

"I really hope so!" She didn't even bother to grab a fork, just ripped a large chunk and slipped it in her mouth. She closed her eyes in wonder as the explosion of sweet cinnamon and bread melted in mouth. A soft satisfied moan left her making a smile spread across Fitz's face.

"Good?" She responded by snatching the plate from his hands and devouring the remnants of her breakfast. He simply watched her in felt a bit embarrassed for eating like a giraffe in front of him, but he seemed to be enjoying it. When she finally finished she set the plate next to her and rested her hands on her full belly.

"Jesus that was amazing. Like, probably the greatest breakfast I have ever had in my life, and my gram gram makes some amazing pancakes." His face suddenly lit up.

"Does she?" Olivia nodded slowly at his sudden enthusiasm. "What's she like?"

"You really want to know?" He nodded. He was leaning on the doorframe, arms crossed over his chest comfortably. "Umm...well, she is the sweetest being on the planet. Literally not a bad bone in her body. She lives in this cute little orange house just on the edge of the city. She's always gardening so you can imagine how our house stood out bright orange and filled will hydrangeas and roses and tulips.

"She just has this pure spirit. The genuine article is what she is. She was also so patient with me, always coming back with more love even when I tried to push her away. She was sixty when I moved in with her and still working full time, the last thing she needed was some emotionally damaged teenager with an attitude but she took me in and nurtured me until I could see the light again."

"She sounds amazing."

"She is, she really is." Olivia smiled to herself as she thought of her grandmother. She really was the light of her life. She couldn't get over how blessed she was to still have her.

"I hope you'll introduce us someday." He walked over to her and rested between her legs. The soft look in his eyes made her feel so safe and reminded her she could trust him. He was the boy you could take home to grandma, and she had every intention to.

"She would tear me a new one if I didn't." He brought his hand to her cheek and she leaned into it happily. "She's the reason I'm only semi-fucked up."

"Don't say that."

"Say what?"

"That you're fucked up."

"It's the truth."

"No it's not. You aren't fucked up. You had fucked up things happen to you, but _you_ are _not_ fucked up. You are amazingly brilliant and beautiful. You made it to the other side. That makes you strong." His words surrounded her, almost suffocating her. She wanted to believe him, god did she want his words to be true, but there was no way. Her past happened to her for a reason unbeknownst to her and it was probably better that way. Bad things happen to bad people. She pushed him away.

"I um...I need to go do something." She jumped off the counter and ran to her bathroom connected to her bedroom and shut the door. She stayed pressed against it, attempting to catch her breath. She could still hear his words in her head, but they weren't encoding. Everything sounded so simple and easy coming from Fitz's lips, but his words were always sweet like fallacies.

Olivia turned on the shower, quickly stripped off Fitz's shirt and stepped into the glass box. She let the warm water envelope her, praying that the she would find some clarity. Everything was changing in a way that could mean lifelong happiness, but she just couldn't make sense of it. A lifetime of misery and suddenly one person can give her everything. Why couldn't she just accept it? What was so hard about letting him take her in his arms and whisper sweet things of their future in her ear? What was wrong with wanting a future with Fitz? Why couldn't she forget the past?

Olivia felt a cold breeze hit her suddenly and the sound of the shower door closing. She took a deep breath, no idea what to say to him.

"Livvie." She turned to face him making sure to keep her eyes on his face so she didn't get distracted. He had her shampoo in his hands and was dispensing a hearty amount into his palm.

"Fitz, I don't want to talk about—"

"Be quiet and turn around."

"But—"

"Turn around." She sighed and did as she was told. She felt him step closer to her, his proximity intoxicating her. It was crazy how he had the power to capture her without doing a thing. She felt his gentle hands in her hair gathering and caressing her curls. His nimble fingers massaged her scalp releasing tensions she didn't realize were pent inside.

"You know why I wanted to become president?" He said softly into her ear. She simply shook her head, the ecstasy of his hands in her head keeping her full attention.

"It was the one position my father could never have. He had everything; money, women, success and friends. He had everything and he knew he had everything. It made it so easy for him to look down on me and tell me I could never amount to anything because he had it." Olivia opened her eyes and watched the water falling before her as if his words were the droplets. "As good as Big Jerry was, he wasn't good enough to be president. Wasn't disciplined or eager enough to reach for it. He wanted it, god did he want it, but he couldn't have it. I made sure I could. And he knew that I wanted it, so he made sure to cut me down at every opportunity. Turn around."

His fingers left her and she turned to face him. His face was soft and so...open. There was no sadness or remorse in his eyes, simply understanding. Olivia leaned back and allowed the water to erase the shampoo from her hair. Her eyes never left his as she searched for any inkling of weakness. He was opening up to her and unlike her moment last night, there was no breakdown on the horizon or second thoughts. He was here in this moment with her, open and willing with no qualms.

When her hair was shampoo free she turned around again and rested her head on his chest, his arms meeting her hips.

"I spent my entire life fighting my father's words, trying to be a better man, refusing to be destined for failure. It was so hard to leave his impact behind, I mean, over thirty years of emotional abuse really does take its toll." Olivia snorted at the familiarity. "I gave him power over me and let other people control my life because I was too comfortable with the abuse. It was easier for me to just say "_yes sir" _instead of fighting back. My entire life was lived that way and it was exhausting. But here you are." Olivia raised her head so she could see him looking down at her with a smile on his face.

"You showed me my strength, my power. You forced me to realize that the carnage required to fight back is well worth it. My happiness is worth the failed expectations of those around me. Olivia, you make me worth something. You are my reason for everything. I want you to realize how important you are. I know your whole life you felt like you weren't worth anything to your father or anyone, but I'm telling you that right now in this moment, you mean the entire universe to someone. You are someone's reason to wake up in the morning and _live_. Kevin can't take that away from you. I will spend the rest of my life trying to convince you of how much you matter. So try to push and isolate yourself all you want, it won't work. We are in this, Olivia, together. We held hands and jumped over the bridge together and we are going to land the same way we went over; together."

Olivia was so overwhelmed by his words she couldn't speak. She wanted to say thank you or let him know that she trusted him. She needed to say something because he deserved that. He understood her better than anyone roaming this earth: he knew how to pull her in and make her feel comfortable and safe simply with words. In his arms was her sanctuary, her retreat and refuse. He was it, what she had been searching for her entire life. The closure she would never receive, the love she could never find, the never ending light at the end of the dock of life guiding her home. He was all these things for her and she couldn't even manage to say thank you.

Olivia brought her hands to his wet and messy curls, savoring the feel of them in her fingers. She held on and pulled him down to her lips, their meeting the only explanation for her appreciation she could find in this moment. The steamy shower seemed to increase in heat as their lips explained everything all the eloquent words in the world could never attempt to define. Fitz held her face in his hands as their lips slipped apart, both of them sharing a soft smile. This was it, their future was set. No matter the obstacles being hurled at them, it was all handled in this moment. They were created to raise each other up, to be the rock the other can rest one when exhausted. They were bonded in a spiritual marriage, a moment of joining together that no paperwork or priest could verify. The world was waiting for them to find each other so they could conquer it, and conquer they shall.

* * *

Olivia felt a strange feeling of comfort surging through her over the course of the day. She was back on her stomping ground of the campaign trail and couldn't hide her joy at the familiarity of the hectic experience. But it was something besides work and being around her colleagues again. As much as she hated to admit it, she was feeling ecstatic because of Fitz. It had been two days since their night in her apartment and they had almost forgotten how to fake their professional only relationship. Before he left for his meeting with the lawyers in California, he was constantly stealing glances at her and finding excuses to praise her with his touch. He spent most of the morning making her laugh with stupid text messages. The bad thing was Olivia was completely falling into the trap and giving in. She was reciprocating the messiness, consequences be damned. She had never felt a happiness like this in her life and she wanted to milk it for as long as possible.

"Ms. Pope?" Tim, one of her young interns with a desperate crush on her, peeked his head into her makeshift office in the hotel conference room. They were in Colorado for the next few days.

"Yes, Tim?"

"Um, Mrs. Grant is here to speak with you." She had to stop herself from chuckling at Tim for referencing Mellie as Mrs. Grant. She knew better than anyone that that title was moving to a new location very soon.

"She's back from California already? They just left like, yesterday."

"I guess so."

"Send her in." Olivia's phone vibrated next to her on the table and she glanced over to see it was from Fitz. She smiled to herself and promised to read it once Mellie left. Mellie entered the conference and slammed the door shut. She did not look pleased.

"Mellie, what's wrong?"

"Oh don't you dare come at me with that fake decency, Olivia."

"What?"

"I can't believe you would do this to me. I thought we were equals, partners even!"

"Mellie, you are going to have to fill me in because I have no idea what you are talking about."

"Really, Olivia? So you want to pretend that you aren't sleeping with my husband?"


	10. Chapter 9

_"Have a gr8 day!" _

Fitz chuckled to himself as he read the text from Olivia, her text speak so unusual for her.

_"Did you just say great with an 8?"_

_ "What! Its text talk! Get with it, old man!" _

Fitz was sitting inside the conference room alone while his lawyer went to grab coffee. Mellie and her lawyer were set to meet them here in ten minutes for the first set of papers to be signed to start the divorce process. Even though he had desired this divorce for awhile, he always imagined a feeling of regret or nostalgia to come over him when the proceedings were to begin. Right now, he was on a high and was surely flying higher. He had his Livvie and today marked the day that everything with her would soon come to fruition. This was a great day, a day for celebration and positivity and not for reminiscing on the horrible past.

He continued to waste the time on his phone.

_"Old man? You weren't calling me that last night (; " _

_ ":o Governor! That is highly inappropriate!"_

_ "You know I love being inappropriate (;" _

_ "Aren't you supposed to be getting divorced or something? Pay attention."_

_ "I'm bored. Entertain me." _

_ "Can't. Some of us are actually working to get you elected."_

_ "Rude!"_

_ "Watevr! TTYL. BYE."_

_ "Bye SB."_

He placed his phone on the table and tapped his fingers on the table impatiently. A few minutes went by and his phone vibrated again.

"_3_"

He was about to reply when the door , his lawyer, Mellie and her lawyer Josie walked in and took their seats. Fitz watched Mellie closely to size up her mood and he couldn't read her. She was refusing his gaze and had her arms folded across her chest defensively. He just wanted to sign these papers quickly and get back to the trail. He hated leaving the campaign for personal matters such as this, but things had to be done. He wanted this divorce to be well on its way by the time, god willing, he was preparing for taking the office.

"Let's get this show started, shall we?" Trent joked with a smile. "I assume you have your files on hand?"

"Yes, everything we agreed upon at the original meeting stands." Josie pulled a packet of files from her briefcase. Mellie was staring out the window, her mind clearly racing. They were sitting opposite each other and Fitz felt the need to reach out to her. This was a pivotal moment in both their lives, and he didn't want the animosity between them.

"Hey," He whispered to her as the lawyers went over the legalities. She didn't pay him any mind. "Mel—"

"Do not talk to me you fucking sleaze!" She spat at him. Her words were so venomous he fell back in his chair.

"Well, that was a bit much, don't you think?"

"Ha! You have no idea."

"Mellie, I know this is hard on you. Hell, this is hard on me too and I'm the one who pushed this divorce. But this is in the best interest of our entire family. I don't want us to come out of this as enemies. I value the relationship we have and I know that I can't eradicate you from my life completely. I don't want to erase you from my life." Fitz meant every word. His night with Olivia had placed a lot of things into perspective for him. He had spent so many years hating Mellie for all the things he didn't have instead of taking responsibility for actions he set in motion. He was realizing that he truly was in love for the first time in his life and that there was no time to waste on hate. Hate solves nothing, only love can heal. Love would heal him, his relationship with Mellie and would bring Olivia to him. Love would patch the ancient wounds on both of their souls. He felt like a brand new man and that he had discovered the secret of the universe.

"Screw you, Fitzgerald!"

"What?" He was confused by her response. Did she not hear anything he had just said?

"I said screw you, asshole!" She screamed it this time stopping Josie and Trent. "Josie, rip up the papers."

"What?"

"Can no one fucking hear today? I said rip the papers!" Josie sat there stunned. Mellie rose from her seat and headed for the other end of the table.

"Mellie, what are you doing?"

"Are you blind too?"

"Mellie, stop and think about what you are doing! We already planned this! We agreed to keep this civil!"

"I am done being civil with you! Civil for twenty whole years and what do I get? I _made_ you, Fitz! You are where you are right now because of me and me alone! Not Big Jerry, not Cyrus and certainly not that little whore!" Fitz felt the color drain from his face. Oh no.

"W-what are you talking about?" She had the papers in her hands now and with one glorious sound his secured future was snatched in two. "Mellie!"

"I know! I know everything! You are a liar and you will pay! I will not go down quietly. You want to leave me? You really want to go to war with me? That is _my_ house! Divorcing me comes complete with a film crew, national news networks and a court room. You really want this? You want your little harlot? You think you can just ditch me and move some little _girl_ into my house? You must not know me very well!" Everyone in the room was stunned. In a matter of minutes Mellie had transformed into Medea. His life went from an inspiring fairy tale into a Shakespearean drama instantly. Mellie's eyes were black with rage and her breathing was heavy. For the first time in years, Fitz was afraid of her.

"The choice is yours, Mr. Grant." She grabbed her purse and stormed out the office. Josie gathered her materials quickly.

"Umm...I'll contact you? I have no idea what is going on." She stumbled out as she left.

"What the hell just happened?" Trent turned his chair to face Fitz who was staring at the end of the table as if Mellie was still there.

"I think my wife just declared war." Fitz said in a daze.

"But why? Everything was set! You both wanted to do this amicably and without any negativity. Everything down the middle!"

"She found out..." Fitz put his head in his hands. "Shit, how did she find out?"

"Fitz, you told me there was nothing to worry about. You told me there was no other woman..."

"I didn't lie to you."

"Well then what is she—"

"She isn't just another woman."

"Jesus fucking christ, Fitz! This is something I needed to know! This changes everything! I set this entire case up thinking you were squeaky clean! A mistress changes _everything_! The cards are all in her hand now! With your running for President and her desperation to be First Lady, she could end you. The PR hail storm she could rain upon you with this revelation? I can't save you from this." Fitz could only think about Olivia and warning her. This wasn't about him, but her. He could care less about losing the presidency or his career, he just wanted to spare her the scrutiny. It would destroy all her hopes of the continuing her career or even living a normal life. These allegations would destroy Olivia.

"Are you even listening to me?"

"I have to go. I'll call you when I figure this shit out."

* * *

Fitz was restless the entire day. He needed to speak with Olivia, but they had him running around doing interviews and meeting with campaigners at different stations around the city. He hadn't had a chance to slip her a text or call since his phone died that morning. Mellie was probably back on the trail now and he had no clue what she had planned. She was a madwoman this morning; a woman scorned. He wanted to spare everyone of this, so desperately wanted to keep things from escalating to this point. Everyone would suffer from the divorce going to court and getting into the hands of the media. Karen and Jerry would be teased in school: kids of the cheating governor, the spawn of a sleaze. Olivia's life would be dissected and tarnished forever. Fitz would never be able to work in politics again, the backlash from losing the election and being outed as a cheater would be beyond repair. Mellie would be portrayed as foolish for standing by the man that cheated her out of everything she had worked for.

It was half past four when he was finally in the car headed for the hanger to meet the plane. There was a charger in the car and Fitz was praising god as he hooked his phone up and watched the iPhone surge back to life. He had three missed calls from Cyrus and two texts from Karen and Jerry. He was disappointed that he had none from Olivia, but he remembered that he never responded to her last one.

_"She knows. Be careful. Don't worry." _

Fitz prayed that she read his message before Mellie got her first.

* * *

It was late when Fitz returned to the hotel. He was shuffled off to a benefit dinner the moment he stepped off the plane. He was physically and emotionally exhausted from the day, but he had to see Liv and make sure she was alright. Seeing her was the worst possible decision he could make but he could care less. His phone vibrated in his pocket and he was praying it was her.

"Liv?"

"You really shouldn't shout out names when answering the phone. And I got you this smart phone for a reason. It _tells_ you who is calling." Cyrus chastised on the other end.

"Cy, I can't talk now."

"Too bad. Come to my room, now."

"I can't—"

"You can, will and are ordered." Fitz groaned as the call went dead and he took his detour to room 465. He didn't need to knock, the door flying open the moment he stood in front of it. When he walked past Cyrus he felt a rush of relief to see Olivia sitting on the couch. He sat in front of her on his knees.

"Liv! I'm so sorry. Are you alright?" She looked lost, no true emotions on her face.

"I'm alright."

"We need to devise a strategy. Mellie has gone rouge and right now she has a pretty good lead on us." Cyrus said getting right down to business.

"Cy, we need the room."

"Fitz, we can't just sit around while Mellie has all the power! The fate of the race is in her hands!"

"Cyrus!" Fitz boomed making Olivia jump. "I understand that perfectly, but right now I do not want to talk about Mellie. I need to talk to Olivia, alone. Take my key and go to my room. We'll talk about this tomorrow." Fitz took the hotel room key from his pocket and tossed it at Cyrus. He left without another word.

"What did she say to you?" He took her hands in his and kissed them gently. She was just staring at the wall. "Livvie, talk to me."

"She just said the truth. That what we are doing is morally wrong and that I'm breaking up a family."

"Liv, you know that is not true! Don't let her words get to you."

"No, no. Mellie is right. I am going against everything I believe to be with you. I am breaking up a family that is twenty years in the making. Even if those things are true, I still don't care. I still want to be with you." Fitz sighed out of relief at her words, so grateful that she was still on board with him. "I love you, Fitz."

"You have no idea how much I love you, Livvie." He pulled her into his arms and held her tightly. Something was off. She was hugging him back, but the reciprocation was weak. She felt distant, like she was going through the motions, a feeling he was all to familiar with considering his marriage.

Mellie had gotten into her head somehow, regardless of her declaring she still wanted him. Mellie had a plan to drive them apart and it seemed she knew getting into Olivia's head was the perfect way to plant her seed.

* * *

Olivia's eyes were wide open that night as Fitz slept soundly behind her. She snuggled deeper into the comfort of his arms, but she felt so out of place. Mellie's words were swirling around in her head like a bee to a freshly blossomed flower. Olivia wanted her to be wrong, god did she _need_ her to be wrong. Her words were so harsh and full of unwarranted truth. She thought being in his arms would make it all mute, but here she was still thinking about it.

_"Mellie, you are going to have to fill me in because I have no idea what you are talking about."_

_ "Really, Olivia? So you want to pretend that you aren't sleeping with my husband?"_

_ Olivia felt her body tense and the room lift from its center._

_ "W-what?"_

_ "What is it with people and their hearing today? Are you an idiot? Do not play dumb with me Olivia Pope!"_

_ "Mellie, honestly, I have no idea what you are talking about!" A harsh cackle left Mellie and Olivia looked on in fear. She was afraid of Mellie in this moment, a frightening dark power radiating from her._

_ "Olivia, I never viewed you as the ignorant romantic type, but mother did always say to not judge a book by its cover."_

_ "Mellie—"_

_ "Shut up, whore!" Olivia sunk into her chair and looked at her hands. "I trusted you. I had Cyrus bring you in because he told me you were the best of the best and you could get my husband elected. You promised me that you would get us into the White House! Yet here you are sneaking your way into the position I have worked so tirelessly to uphold."_

_ "Mellie, I had nothing to do with the divorce!"_

_ "Did I ask you to speak?" Olivia shook her head like a child. "It doesn't matter what your intentions were. You can save all your declarations of love and the overused "we never meant for it to go this far" because quite frankly, I do not care. What I care about is getting what I rightfully deserve. I deserve the White House and I will stop at nothing to get there."_

_ "Mellie, do you hear yourself? The presidency isn't everything! Think about yourself about your husband! Neither of you are happy together so why force it?"_

_ "You really don't get it, do you? Cyrus was wrong about you. He told me you were tough and calculating and refused to work with emotions. Yet, here you are begging me to consider my poor weak excuse of a husband's feelings. You are weak Olivia, too weak to be with someone like Fitz. He needs structure and commands. I had to mold Fitz into the man he is today and without me he will fall apart. He does not need you! You are a blip on the radar, something he isn't used too. I let the puppy off the leash and he came home with a chewed up stick thinking it was something special. _

_ "With time, he will forget about you and whatever this little thing the two of you have going on. You are destroying my family, something I spent a lot of time to build. What kind of a woman can sit there so oblivious to what she is doing to someone else? He belongs with me and he will realize that very soon and if he doesn't I will make sure he doesn't step near the gates of the White House. Do you want to have that responsibility on your shoulders, Olivia? Do you want to be the reason Fitz does not achieve his destiny? Do you want to have your entire way of living obliterated? Because believe me, I will destroy you. I will discover every little detail about your life since the moment you took your very first shit. I see through your act, Pope. You want everyone to believe you are one of the big bad dogs but in reality you are a scared little puppy, just like him. So you end this and you end this right now. Do you understand me?"_

_ Olivia sat in stunned silence, the tears edging out the corners of her eyes._

_ "I asked you a question!"_

_ "Yes." _

_ "Yes what?"_

_ "Yes, I understand."_

Mellie talked to Olivia in the same tone and demeanor her father had. The superiority and way he was able to break her down...She hated this feeling of weakness, the feeling of not being sure what to do. She trusted Fitz with every ounce of herself, but the fact that Mellie was able to scare her so easily frightened her. The prospect of her entire life being shown to the world frightened her. She spent her entire life to build her life back from the ashes, just as Mellie had to build Fitz into the perfect candidate. Mellie had all the power in her hands. She giveth and was more than willing to taketh away.

* * *

**A/N: Do you think Mellie is bluffing? I love HBIC Mellie, its really fun to write! Leave your thoughts! **


	11. Chapter 10

**A/N: Your responses to the last chapter had me falling over! A lot of y'all are really upset about how Mellie talked to Liv but more so that Liv just took it. Just know that there is a method to my madness! Liv has a lot of growing to do, and it will all come full circle in due time! Mellie will get hers, just be patient and hang on! Thank you for sticking around, I truly love writing this and your responses make it all worth it! The fact that you care enough to be upset means something! **

* * *

"Absolutely not!" Fitz was hysterical, refusing to hear anything Cyrus and Olivia were proposing.

"I don't see how we have another option!" Cyrus was sitting next to Olivia on the couch; a united front.

"Come on! We have come too far just to buy into her bullshit! I am not calling off this divorce! I am not going back to that life! I promised the American people something and I refuse to renig because Mellie wants to throw a tantrum!"

"Fitz, it won't matter what promises you make to the voters because they won't be voting for you!" Olivia chimed in. He stopped pacing and looked at her. She couldn't handle his gaze, the ferocity of it hurting her soul.

"I can't believe you, Olivia."

"Fitz, she is doing her job. We are trying to figure out a way to keep you in this election! Quite frankly, you don't have a choice but to accept Mellie's demands seeing as you have a debate in less than forty-eight hours and we have barely gone over your responses." Fitz continued to ignore Cyrus.

"We were in this together. You told me you trusted me."

"I do trust you." She responded quietly.

"Does no one remember that we are running an _election_ here, not Jerry Springer?"

"If you trusted me then you wouldn't be going against me! If you trusted me you would believe that I can get us out of this unscathed."

"I am not going against you!" She rose a look of disbelief on her face. "I am looking out for you! I see you, Fitz, all of you. I know you, and I know you feel like I am betraying you right now, but this is the answer. I could never forgive myself if you didn't make it to the Oval." He felt the sincerity of her words, but it did nothing to relieve his anger. He was so angry at her, at the world. He simply wanted her and for the world to know she belonged to him. Was he asking for too much?

"Mellie had a live interview with Caroline set up for this evening. It can go one of two ways: either you by her side declaring your resurgence of passion along the trail, or she takes it alone and destroys your candidacy. Either way, Mellie wins." He was still staring at Olivia, or the shriveled up shell of the woman he thought loved him. He was disgusted with the sight of her, a feeling he never thought could be directed at her.

"Everyone out."

"Fitz—"

"I can't stand the sight of either of you right now. I need to be alone. So get out."

"When are you going to start acting like a man who wants to be president instead of a lovesick teenager? Get your head in the game, Fitzgerald!" Cyrus stormed out.

"You can leave too." Olivia was still standing, watching him.

"You hate me."

"I could never hate you. I hate your actions. I hate that you don't believe I'm enough." She took steps towards him but he stepped away.

"I _do_! That is why I'm doing this."

"No. You are being a coward. You let Mellie get in your head. You keep letting other people control you, Liv! After everything we shared with each other? After everything we have been through, you keep going back to that old place! I don't know what to say to you anymore. I can't help you because you don't want to change. You say you hate being afraid but you keep swimming in your fear. I have done everything possible to make you feel like you deserve the world, that you can do _anything_, but you don't believe me. You don't believe in me, or us or anything."

"You do not get to tell me what I do or do not believe! You have no right! You don't know what she said to me!"

"I'm telling you that it should not matter. Words are simply that, _words_. I have shown you how much you mean to me, put my words into physical things you can see and feel. Mellie is all words, always has been." He stepped towards her and took her face in his hands. Her lids were shut tightly, her breathing heavy. "Believe in us." He said against her trembling lips. "Tell me not to go. Tell me not to do it."

"Fitz—"

"Fight for us, Livvie. Fight for me."

"I...I..."

"_Please_." He was begging her to reject her earlier notion, but he knew it was all in vain. Fear was familiar to her, comfortable. She was raised with it, the feeling taking the place of the mother she never had, making her feel safe.

"You have to go." She stepped out of his embrace and made her way out the door. Rage engulfed Fitz, his hands finding the glass lamp on the table and hurling it at the wall. The shattering of the lamp bringing him a strange comfort. He understood the broken shards on the floor, related to the notion of one's being becoming dislocated. Sitting on his knees in front of the broken pieces, Fitz realized that he didn't want to relate to it anymore. He needed to make some changes.

* * *

Olivia had taken a taxi to a local park and decided to take a long walk to clear her thoughts. The cool Colorado air on the cusp of autumn comforted and cooled her heated thoughts. She wanted to crawl out of her skin and become a different person. She hated Olivia Pope in this moment because everything Fitz had said about her was right. She was an oxymoron, a cowardly lion. The truth was, she did want to be with Fitz and she believed in everything he told her. But she knew that the world had something greater in store for that man, something greater than loving her. He was going to change the world, and he deserved that opportunity without having her baggage trailing behind.

An empty swing became available and Olivia sat on it. The slight feeling of being off the ground made her happy, the memories of going to the park with her grandmother very fond in her memory. It was the first place she had taken Olivia once she moved in. She remembered just sitting upon the swing, no effort being made to accelerate into the air. They simply sat together on the swings in silence. Her grandmother brought her to the same park every Tuesday to swing, and for the first two months all Olivia did was sit. But one day, she kicked her legs and began to move through the air with ease. The swing set made her feel free, no worries or troubles were allowed to follow you when you were flying through the air. In that moment she was suddenly ready to let her grandmother love her, to attempt to show her how to love. She didn't realize how deeply she missed her gram gram.

Pulling out her phone, she dialed up the familiar number.

"Good morning!" Olivia nearly burst into tears at the sweet soft sound of her voice. She smiled, appreciating her grandmother's genuine greeting.

"Gram gram!"

"Well I'll be damned! My sweet Olivia, how I missed your voice! How are you, sweet pea?"

"I'm...I'm alright. I miss you. So much."

"I always miss you, sweet pea. When are you coming to see me?"

"Soon. The moment the campaign ends I am all yours."

"How is that? Your work. You sound exhausted." She had no idea.

"Its tiring but rewarding."

"Alright, what is the matter?"

"What?"

"These answers, your voice, something is wrong."

"Nothing is wrong! Just tired. You know I refuse to sleep!"

"It's a boy, isn't it?"

"Gram gram!"

"My apologies. This is bigger than a boy. This is about a _man_." She could do nothing but chuckle at her grandmother's blunt comments. She could read Olivia like a book even when she was out of her presence.

"Possibly."

"Oh, sweet pea, that is great! That you found a man, not the issues, obviously. You bring him to meet me immediately."

"Well...things are bit...complicated."

"In my day, complicated only meant one thing, and that one thing meant married." The air she was breathing was lost and she began to cough uncontrollably. This woman was a mind reader!

"Gram..."

"I never judge, but you know I call things as I see them."

"And I appreciate you for it."

"All I can say is, I know you, sweet pea. You have never been one too keen on dating or relationships and I always respected that. This man clearly means the world to you, to have you fumbling to call my old patootie up for advice. You were a tough child to raise, but that was due to your asshole of a father treating you the way he did all those years. You were cold and mean and it took everything for me not to grab a switch and swat you! But you have your mother's spirit and with each passing day you would soften and you let me in. What did I always say about her?"

"That she was feisty and full of heart, a free spirit."

"Exactly. You are your mother's child. It is hard to believe, but for those few moments she was able to hold you in her arms, she loved you with everything she had. You don't want to love her because you never knew her, but it is ok to love the unknown. This man? You love him and it scares you because it is unknown to you. Let yourself go. _Love_, Liv! Live life and enjoy it." Olivia longed for her grandmother's warm embrace.

"Thank you gram gram." She truly was. Her words were exactly what she needed to hear. Olivia had a lot to think about. One thing was for sure, she needed to make some changes.

* * *

"Governor, I just think your plan to lower the student loans for students is magnificent!" Fitz shook hands with a wealthy contributor to the campaign with vigor.

"Thank you, Mrs. Nihat. I really want to do all I can to get the cost of education down. We really are placing too much weight on the shoulders of our future leaders."

"That is what I love to hear! You can expect a lovely donation to the campaign before the night ends." She winked and walked away. Fitz was at yet another benefit luncheon, doing all he could to schmooze his colleagues into pumping more money into the campaign as they hit the last leg of the race. He couldn't believe that it was almost over, everything they had been working relentlessly for was about to come to completion, and it would be out of his hands. As he walked around greeting and conversing, all these people he was supposed to know he barely recognized. He was realizing that for majority of the last few months, the only person he spent his time on was Olivia. He was resenting that now, as everything was falling apart. As he usually was, Cyrus had been right about everything; He had allowed Olivia to become a hurricane over his life, eclipsing his duties and dreams. She was his dream, but he allowed her to become the only one in his mind. Becoming president was his destiny, and regardless of how much he loved her, he had to place himself first.

"Mr. Grant." Her icy voice made his spine tingle, anger spreading through his veins like his own blood. He turned to face her, her chilling blue eyes piercing into him like icicles. She looked stunning in her ruby gown, the material tightening around her waist drawing much attention to her devilish curves.

"Mellie." He said simply.

"I'm sure Cyrus explained to you the plans for this evening?" She grabbed a flute of champagne from a passing waiter and took a long sip. He watched as her crimson lipstick stained the glass.

"He did."

"And I expect that you shall be there on time?"

"I never said anything about going to your interview."

"Oh, Fitz, honey. I thought you were smarter than that. Surely I taught you better than to refuse offers that are so clearly in your favor."

"You do not control me, Mellie. You do not get to pull me along like a puppet. Your threats do not scare me."

"Honey, I do not make threats. These are assurances. I can assure you that I _will_ reveal to the entire world that you are a lowlife cheater and that I, your poor and unsuspecting wife, stayed simply out of love and good faith. You cannot win this, I hold the playbook in my hands."

Fitz found himself clenching and unclenching his fist, his anger reaching a peak. He could not believe what he ever saw in this temptress, her soul nothing but evil.

"You don't have _any_ proof."

"Oh?" She went into her clutch and pulled out her phone, the screen already cued to her photos. She handed it to him and his brow furrowed as he slid by picture after picture. Their late night swim at the hot spring in Vegas, the the moment he quickly found her hand as he prepared to give a speech at a rally in Ohio, the kiss they shared after their shower in her apartment just days ago...

"Speechless? I thought you would be. CNN is sending their make-up people for me at around six. Unless you have someone of your own, you should probably make it to the conference room around that time. See you tonight, _honey_." She snatched her phone from his stunned hand and sauntered to the exit, stopping every few moments to greet people around her. She was something else, but he knew Mellie. Fitz had to beat her at her own game.

* * *

"You can't be here!"

"Why not?" Cyrus was attempting to shuffle Olivia out the area where the interview was to be shot in the hotel conference room, but she was not budging.

"The last thing I need is for him to see you and miraculously change his mind. You are a distraction. You have to go."

"I am the assistant campaign manager! I am your communications director. This directly affects the rest of the campaign, so I need to be here to make sure things run smoothly."

"You can do all of that! From across the hall and watching from a monitor."

"Cyrus, I am fine. He is fine. We both know the reality of the situation. It has been handled."

"Has it?" He took her arm and led her away from the hustle of the workers setting up equipment. His eyes took a softer look. "the last time you said it was handled you guys had what I assume to be a sex marathon in your apartment. Which, you know, is totally fine and all since no one really knew about it except for me. And of course his wife."

"Is there a point to be made at some point?"

"What are you doing, Liv? Do you see the mess you have gotten yourself into? Mellie isn't some push over and Fitz is no ordinary man."

"I understand that. I got in way over my head. We tried to fix each other and..." He walked into the room and found her eyes immediately. She felt breathless as she always did when he looked at her that way; like all the stars and constellations of the universe were hidden inside her. "We tried to fix each other but we are both beyond repair. Only Mellie can fix him, and no one can fix me."

"Liv," Cyrus took her hands and squeezed them gently. "For as long as I have know you, I have always been in awe of how amazing you are. Your strength and cunning? Your ability to be logical yet still connect with the core of an issue? You are _special_, Olivia. You do not need fixing." She smiled at him and rested her head on his shoulder. Cyrus and Olivia did not always see eye to eye, majority of the time they were opposed to each other, but she loved him dearly. His brutal honesty was something she took pleasure in, regardless of how often it harmed her spirit. She knew this man, and manipulation and harsh words were his version of love. It was twisted and completely unhealthy, but it was the only way he knew to show he cared.

"Can I borrow her for a moment?" The low baritone shook her back to the real world.

"Does it matter what I say?" Cyrus sighed and walked away.

"Governor." She said plainly.

"Livvie." They stood there for a moment, taking the other in. Her eyes met the strong arms that only a night before held her so protectively, as if she belonged to him. The lips that had intertwined with hers, making her feel elegant and perfect. Those eyes that revealed everything about herself she never knew was possible. Everything about him that she would never be able to have again. This was their final minute.

"I could fight for us." He said in a soft whisper that tickled her skin. "I could take the entire world for us, taking out anyone that tried to stand in my way. I can do it if you just tell me the words. Tell me yes and I can make it all happen." Olivia shut her eyes to escape his words of promise, knowing better than to become sucked into it all. "It doesn't matter what I could do, does it?" She felt him step away from her and she was able to look at him once again. His emotionless face cut her deeply.

"No." She said softly.

"Because we are over. Right?" She was hesitant to respond, the words "over" coming from him making it all too real. She felt her head move to a nod. Just like that he was gone from her side. She watched as he met Mellie at the edge of the set, her hand snaking to meet his and a smile spreading along her face. Olivia felt sick, the emptiness of her world being sucked from her making her feel off. She had no right to cry, to feel sorry for herself, because she did this. She decided to take Cyrus's advice and watch from across the hall.

* * *

Fitz was surprisingly calm as he sat next to Mellie on the couch. She kept trying to slide closer to him, but he managed to keep a decent distance from her. He was no longer afraid of what had to happen. He knew what had to be done to keep himself in this race, but more importantly to free himself from the confines of his past.

"You ready?" She whispered to him as Carolyn took her place across from them.

"I am." He smiled at her weakly.

"Live in three...two..."

"Hello ago Governor! Mrs. Grant."

"Hello, Caroline." The answered in sync.

"Well, last time we met, it wasn't under the best of circumstances. I'm hoping this time may be a tad bit different?" Mellie and Fitz looked at each other and shared a smile. Her eyes softened.

"I would hope so as well."

"Do you want to say it or..."

"No, no. It should come from you." She patted his hand and his smile widened.

"I'm quite anxious to hear this now! The team getting back together?" Caroline was leaning forward in anticipation.

"Well, Caroline. You see..." Fitz took a deep breath and looked to the side hoping to see Olivia there. She was nowhere in sight.

"Caroline." He sat up straight and slipped his hand from Mellie's grasp. "I had an affair."

* * *

**A/N: DUN DUN DUN! Leave your thoughts! **


	12. Chapter 11

**A/N: I have to say, I am having more and more fun writing these chapters. Watching Fitz come into his own has been so fun and don't worry, Olivia's time is vast approaching! Once again, thank you for reading and sticking by this story!**

* * *

"Get him out of there!" Cyrus's face was beet red from running and sheer panic. Olivia had sprinted from the meeting room to the set and looked on in shock. She should be helping get the cameras shut off or shutting the interview down, but she could only watch like a spectator. A spectator of her biggest secret being revealed to the world on live television. Did he hate her that much? Did she hurt him so deeply that he felt the only solution was outing her? Outing them? She felt the time they spent together was sacred, something they would remember for the rest of their lives. Those moments were their deepest secret, happiest moments. Those months were their lives.

"I'm sorry Governor, what did you say?" Caroline had a look of sheer shock on her face, confused seeing as at their last interview she asked Fitz off the record if there was any infidelity and he told her no. Olivia looked at Mellie and saw she shared Caroline's expression. The clouds were beginning to part.

"Holy shit." Olivia said to herself.

"I had an affair. It was years ago, before any of this. It was the first rough patch in our marriage and I was cowardly and stepped out. So much was going on with the kids being so young and making our first run at public office. I let my insecurities get in the way and did the most unthinkable thing to the most important person in my life. We made it through that ordeal together, Mellie and I. We were able to recover from that and still love and trust each other.

"I cannot even describe the shame I felt for myself, having to see my wife learn to trust me again. Apologies were mute, they could never be enough to repent for what I did. But somehow, she stayed with me. For some strange reason she saw the honesty in my words and was able to see the sincerity of my shame." Fitz took Mellie's hand and looked her dead in the eyes. "She was able to see how sorry I was to have hurt her."

"Fitz..." She whispered while holding back tears. She could only nod her head, acknowledging his hidden apology.

"Does this act of infidelity add to the reasoning for the divorce?"

"No." Mellie said firmly.

"Absolutely not. Like we told you in the original interview, we have just grown apart. We have grown into different people over the years with opposing ambitions and views on life. In all honesty, Mellie has grown too amazing for a man like me to handle. She deserves better than me, and I truly mean that. There is someone out there that is going to make her a thousand times happier than I ever could, and I cannot wait to interrogate him over a glass of scotch!" Smiles were shared, melting some of the chill in the air.

"It may seem silly for me to bring this up, but I want the country to know that I have nothing to hide. That I am a human, a man, who makes mistakes. I make mistakes, but I also learn from them and grow from them. I am willing and able to make the best possible decisions in the name of this great land, but I need the people to know that sometimes, I make mistakes. But mistakes make me better."

"Wow." The sound of Cyrus's barking had subsided and Olivia knew he was looking on in awe just like the rest of the staff. It was remarkable. Everyone on the set felt the sincerity, felt touched by his humanity. If she had a ballot in front of her in this moment, she would write Fitzgerald Thomas Grant III over and over again.

"Mrs. Grant?" Caroline had no idea what questions to ask, so floored by his response.

"I-I-I..." Mellie took a deep breath, doing her best to regain her composure. She had just been bested at her own game. Her blackmail was no longer as valuable, her plan had been foiled, but most of all, her husband showed his respect for her for everyone to see. He gave her a reason to leave the animosity behind. "I came to support him, to show that we are always on each other's side." She smiled at him and he reciprocated. "It still saddens me that after all we have been able to recover from in our time together, that we could not last through the ordeal we are currently suffering. But I can vouch for this man and his sincerity and honesty. Fitzgerald is a great man. "

"And Mellie is a remarkable woman. A woman who has a very bright future in politics, might I add."

"Really?"

"Oh yes! Lets not forget that she graduated top of our class at Harvard. I was sitting comfortably in the middle yet here I am running for President!" They all chuckled, releasing the tense feeling in the air.

"Is this in your plans, Mrs. Grant."

"Well, I haven't really given anything much thought yet. The divorce and campaign have taken most of time. Thinking about myself at a time like this would seem kind of selfish."

"She's being modest, Caroline. It is most definitely in her plans to put her hat in the ring for Governor of California, and you can bet that all of my support will be placed upon her!" Mellie had a look of disbelief on her face. She came into this interview with a plan, and everything was haywire. Fitz tossed in a wildcard, switched the order and the suite of choice.

"Well, Mrs. Grant, it seems that you don't have much of a choice. The Governor is tossing your name in the hat whether you like it or not!"

"I guess so. This man is something else, isn't he? When he wants something, _really_ wants something, he makes sure he gets it."

"Well, I think I can speak for all the voters out there when I say that your honesty over this campaign is unparalleled of modern day politicians. Hell, of _any _politician I have seen. There is just something about you, Governor. I trust you and I think the entire country does as well."

"That is all I could ever ask for." His eyes found Olivia. "Your trust is what is most important to me."

* * *

The set had been taken apart and the room was now empty minus Cyrus basically kissing Fitz in the corner. Olivia stood by the door, unsure what to do or where to go. His  
message had been loud and clear. This campaign belonged to Fitz and what he wanted would go. There would be no more manipulation or threats for the remainder of the race. Olivia was still amazed by the plan he had created all by himself. She always believed in him, but she couldn't help but be shocked when he proved her faith to be well placed. But what did this mean for them?

* * *

"What the hell was that, Fitz?" Mellie was raging, keeping her distance so she didn't lay a hand on him in her stint of anger.

"Did you really think I was going to go out there and lie? You forced my hand, Mellie!"

"But you _did _lie! Very clever of you, by the way. How long ago is "way before this"? Five? Ten years ago? That how long you've been screwing Olivia?"

"Keep your voice down! We are still in a hotel."

"How dare you embarrass me on live television like that?"

"I didn't embarrass you."

"You did! I went out there and you made me look like a fool! Made me look like the woman who stands by her man like an idiot even when he is still cheating and using her! I am not that woman!"

"You are not that woman because I will not let you be that woman! Mellie, don't you see? By sinking your claws in and fighting, you are dragging yourself closer and closer to becoming that woman. Staying with the husband that cheats, that doesn't love her anymore, and for what? For a fancy title and stupid duties? You deserve better."

"No!" She edged in and stuck her finger in his face. "You do _not_ tell me what I deserve you ungrateful slut!"

"I meant every word I said." He gently took her wrist and lowered to her sides. "About you deserving a man that could handle and appreciate you. About you having a brilliant future. About how _sorry_ I am that I hurt you."

"Shut up."

"I wasn't lying, Mel."

"Shut up!" She pushed him away and stormed into the bathroom. He could hear her sniffling back the tears, doing her best to rebuke the truth that was so obviously there. Fitz had outsmarted her without bringing her down or hurting her. She wanted to hurt him so badly, but she was realizing he had done the one thing she had always wanted; he was beginning to understand her side. Emphasizing and apologizing

"I love her, Mel." He knew she could hear him, the door wide open. "She has brought a light into my life I didn't even know was allowed to exist. She makes me feel, makes me feel alive. I can't even begin to describe what she means to me. But beyond my love for her, I need this divorce for me. I won't be able to live with myself if I keep lying to your face, to the world, about what we are. You mean so much to me and to what I have become, and to keep hurting you? I can't do that. To keep hurting myself and denying us both happiness? I understand, Mel, I really do. We built this together, as a team. You pushed me even when I told myself I didn't want it, that I wasn't good enough. This will all be yours one day, I know it. You are one of the strongest people I know. You will make this happen."

She exited the bathroom, head held high and any sign of tears eradicated. She looked at him and the icy animosity was gone. Without another word, she opened the door and left.

* * *

The debate was upon them and Fitz found himself more focused than he had been since the campaign began. He had become more than familiar with the social policies he wanted to implement and felt extremely confident in his ability to connect with the audience. Tonight would be different. This was his race to lose. He sat in the dressing room behind the auditorium of Arizona State University pondering his thoughts.

"Governor Grant, I have the latest polls for you." She remained by the door, unsure what the new boundaries were.

"And?"

"Your approval rating has shot up fifteen percent. You are leading Reston by two points." Fitz smiled to himself.

"That...that is really great."

"It is. And it was all you." Olivia stepped farther into the room, but still kept her distance. "I can't believe you did that."

"What? Didn't think I had the gall?"

"I thought...I thought you were going to tell them...about us."

"I would never do that to you or to my chances." She lowered her eyes.

"I, um...have you talked to Mellie?"

"She is refusing my calls. She can't hide from me forever, we have another meeting with the lawyers in two weeks."

"It was really clever, what you did. I never knew that you stepped out before." Fitz rolled his eyes.

"Naivety is not a good look on you, Olivia."

"What?"

"There was no other time. You are the only time I stepped out on Mellie. I twisted the truth to work in my favor."

"Oh."

"I've told you this."

"I know."

"So you just further proved that you don't trust me."

"Stop turning me into the bad guy here."

"Is there anything else you need to tell me? I have a debate to prepare for." A look of insult came over her face.

"What does this mean...for us?"

"Us?" She nodded. "There is no more us." He winced at the words leaving his mouth. "Remember?"

"Right...I just thought...you know, never mind."

"Liv."

"What?" There were tears in her eyes now and he felt so worthless knowing he was the source of her tears.

"I'm getting divorced. It is going to be messy. I may become the leader of the free world. My entire way of life is about to change. I think I just...I need to figure out myself and my life before I can bring _us_ back into the equation."

"Of course. You know what is best, governor. Have a good debate. Remember to show them who you are."  
"And who am I, Olivia?" He was curious to know what she truly though of him. After everything, her opinion of him still trumped all.  
She lingered for another moment. "A man who has deep passion inside him. A man who will dedicate himself to whatever it is that needs fixing, no matter how difficult or unpopular it is. Your spirit is so genuine Fitz, your ability to empathize with any and everything? It's a gift. Use that, connect with the people, show them how much you care because you _do _care. You are more than just a man who cheated on his wife, and believe me, that is what they are going to see when you come out tonight. So show them who you truly are. Show them a man who loves with his entire being." She was nearly out the door when she stopped. She turned and caught his eyes, the deep grey enveloping her as if she were walking through a mist. He was standing, arms by his side, and she wanted nothing more than to run into him and feel those arms absorb her. But, moments like that were in the past.  
"Show them the man that loved me." Just like that, she was gone.

* * *

"This is it, people! This is the finale." The entire staff was gathered at the campaign headquarters in Santa Barbara, exhaustion evident on all the faces. "It has been an extremely long road, but here we are at the finish line. I don't know about you, but I think we are going to cross the line victorious!" The staff cheered Cyrus on raising the energy level. "We have done all we can do, and its in the hands of the voters now. We're head to head with Reston, but still holding a three point lead. I think I can speak for the governor and Olivia when I say that you all are the best staff I could ever have asked for. Your hard work and dedication is unlike any I have ever seen. Your work is why we are here, so thank you. Go home and get some sleep. Tomorrow is the big day and I need you all full of energy!" The room erupted in a roar of cheers. Olivia felt a tinge of sadness. This was the last night of endless working. The election was tomorrow and soon everything they had worked for would come to an end. The final debate went beyond smooth, the town hall style allowing Fitz's compassion to shine. He was direct yet humble with each question he was asked, his personality shining over Reston's snarky remarks and serious demeanor. You couldn't help but fall for Fitzgerald Thomas Grant, and Olivia knew that all too well.

Their relationship had remained professional over the remaining weeks, keeping the distance not too difficult with Mellie still around. She couldn't deny that she missed him, missed his laugh and encouraging words. Regardless of the emptiness she felt without him, Olivia felt herself growing stronger everywhere else. With the small amounts of free time she suddenly had since she wasn't sneaking off to meet him, she found herself starting a journal, releasing the tense feelings that had encompassed her for a lifetime. Day by day she felt the scar tissue of her past peeling away, making room for air to reach her soul, making room for growth. Instead of racing past the mirror in the morning, she would spend time looking at herself, growing comfortable with the figure staring back at her. Her smile reached her eyes now whenever she would give herself an encouraging word to start the day.

Olivia always thought after living with her grandmother that she had taken complete control over her life. She had merely found a new way to keep herself from living, forcing her life to be strict and calculated. The clock was the new ruler of her life, but it was the clock of the past; complete with hands that never moved forward, simply ticking in place. Loving Him taught her to live in the moment and simply let life happen. Getting your hands dirty is a necessity in life:without the mess, you will never be able to appreciate the feeling of the dirt washing away.

"This is it, Liv!" Cyrus sat in the seat across from her at the empty table where she was sitting.

"I know. I honestly cannot believe it."

"Me either. A year of working for this guy and suddenly a country full of idiots will decided if we did a good job or not. I don't like it." Olivia smiled at her friend.

"You did a wonderful job."

"So did you. Hell, this entire team worked their asses off. But enough about work, how are you?"

"I'm...I'm good. Really good, actually."

"You seem better. You look a bit happier these days."

"I feel happier."

"Except when he's around, it goes away. You glow when you are working or just hanging around, but the moment he steps in, the glow vanishes." She sighed deeply. "You miss him."

"How can I not? He is the reason I'm finally letting my father go."

"Hey, do not sell yourself short! Everything happens in due time. Do not give him that kind of credit."

"It's true, Cy. I started a journal to write out my feelings and to vent about the past. Every memory I write, every revelation I find somehow circles back to him. The time Kevin locked me in a closet for two hours because I went to a girl's house after school to play house somehow connects to how I felt the first time Fitz and I had a fight. The loneliness and confusion, then sudden relief when it was all over. Or the time He came home drunk one night and told me he could never love me because I looked like my mother, I had the same feeling of anguish, the same _need_ to curl into a ball and die I had when Fitz walked away from me in the courtyard that night. All roads to lead to Fitz and I just...I don't know what to do."

"Go to him." She blinked furiously, trying to make sure those words came from Cyrus.

"What?"

"Olivia, you love that man. Hell, its probably deeper than love. Love just seems like a superficial way to explain what you two have. He has changed your life in a positive way, Liv. I have known you for a long time and never have I seen you this comfortable. It's crazy and normally I would be beyond against it, but I know that man and more importantly, I know you. He is fine now because this campaign is his love, but once this is over, and he is settled into the White House without Mellie? You will be the _only_ thing he will be able to think about. You need each other, and I honestly believe with this time apart you were able to figure out why."

Cyrus was always able to surprise her when his soft side came out. He could be so compassionate and understanding when he wanted to be, and she felt honored to witness it.

"Cy...I don't think that is such a good idea. Too much is changing. It would never work."

"Well...just think about it. We said his chances would completely evaporate once he tried to get divorced and now we're leading. Fitz is no normal man and you are far from a normal woman." He got up from the table, walked around to place a kiss on her head then walked out.

Olivia left the building soon after and took a taxi to the hotel. Her head was swimming with thoughts and she was eager to get to her room, order up whatever wine they had available and jot in her journal. She was nearly to her room when she stopped in the hall and search for her room key.

"Olivia _Wallace_." The pound of her purse meeting the floor echoed through the hallway as she stood there stunned. Olivia was afraid to turn around, though she knew who was waiting for her. The sound of Mellie's heels pounding the wooden floor sent chills up Olivia's spine. She stopped a few feet away and Olivia could feel the smile spreading on her face.

"We need to talk."

* * *

**A/N: Oh Mellie, always up to something! Leave your thoughts! I smell a showdown coming! ;D**


	13. Chapter 12

Olivia sat down on the bed and watched as Mellie paced back and forth in front of her. The small amount of fear she felt at the edge of psyche in the hallway had vanished, replaced with annoyance. Mellie was seriously becoming a pest and Olivia was more than ready to terminate her from her life.

"So, Ms._Wallace—"_

_ "_It's _Pope_, Mellie."

"Is it? That's not what your birth certificate says." She smiled smugly and Olivia felt the urge to punch her in the face.

"Is there a point to this? I do not like having my time wasted."

"Does Fitz know that you are a fraud? Cyrus? Does anyone know who the real Olivia is? Or is lying something that is just natural to you? A hereditary trait passed down from your father's side?"

"Who do you think you are?"

"The woman who has your life in her hands! Olivia, you have no idea how easily I can ruin you. One phone call and it all ends. All your contacts in DC will vanish, your hopes of a position in the White House or anywhere above local city council for that matter, will be eradicated. Do you think the world will take kindly to the daughter of a convicted murderer? A well known one for that matter! You think Fitz is going to marry you when he finds out? Do you really believe the American people will allow you to be their first lady?"

Olivia sat in silence, unsure of how to navigate the thoughts swirling around in her mind. The weaker side of her that she had spent the past weeks trying to suppress was edging out of the darkness, screaming to be heard. Mellie was right: who could ever want someone like her? She was damaged goods, a victim of her bloodline but still useless. They would all hate her, accuse her of being an accomplice, telling her she was not good enough. Was she good enough?

"You will _never_ be able to replace me, Olivia. Fitz may think you can, but he is a clueless child. He has no idea how pivotal I am to his life. I am cookie cutter, blue blooded and intelligent enough to know when to pretend my Ivy League education does not exist. I know how to fake it the _right _way. But you? You tried to fake your entire life, to become someone that you were never supposed to be. You will _never_ be good enough!"

Olivia closed her eyes and the loud noise seemed to vanish. There were no more conflicting voices in her mind, but one. It was simply her own, and the mantra she repeats in front of the mirror every morning suddenly came to her.

_You are not damaged._

_ You are not wrong._

_ You are good enough._

_ You are enough._

Olivia had heard those words come from Fitz a thousand times, but hearing them resonate with her own voice gave them power. It gave them a meaning that before, was non-existent. Olivia finally realized who she was and the power she truly held. No one else had the right to hold precedent over her life, because it was exactly that; _hers_.

"Are you done talking?" Olivia looked Mellie dead in the eyes, no fear radiating from her. A moment of shock passed over her eyes. "Good. Now, it's my turn to talk so why don't you sit down and shut the hell up." Stunned, Mellie backed into the couch and sat down. "I am going to take the responsibility for allowing you to walk around talking to me every which way, but that ends right here. You will _never_ speak to me like some low level servant ever again because I am far from it. Just because you know my full name does not mean you know me. My name does not define me nor do my father's actions. He did not raise me nor do I see him regularly, so the connection ends there, in name.

"I know you think you are clever, trying to play on my insecurities to tear me down. It's cute, actually, trying to expose everyone else's weakness to hide your own. I see right through you, Mellie. You are weak, and a coward. Any woman who is willing to sacrifice her own livelihood to please a group of strangers is pathetic. You try to wrap Fitz under your thumb because you know he has so much strength within himself. You know what he is capable of when you are reigning him in the direction you want. That does not make you better for him or make you a perfect wife! You think you are better than me because you graduated from Harvard? Sweetie, I graduated from Yale two years early with honors and a job with the top firm in DC waiting for me. You are not above me in _any_ way, do you understand?" She nodded slowly, her mouth agape at the words being shot at her in anger. Olivia took a moment to catch her breath and her thoughts. She was extremely angry, but she needed to finish this conversation with a more level head.

"I know I cannot erase my past, as hard as I have tried. It is a part of me, but it is _not_ me. Cyrus knows. Fitz knows. He knows everything because I told him everything. You know what he told me? He told me that I was enough. That I was perfect regardless of how fucked up my life turned out to be. He loved me regardless even when I refused to love myself. Everything you just told me I have been telling myself for twenty years. It wasn't until recently that I realized it's all bullshit. That I have a choice to make my life the way I want it to be. And I want him. It may not be today or tomorrow, but one day we will be together, because we will make the choice to make it happen. You do not control us or our lives. Fitz will become president tomorrow night and he will be a damn good one, too. He doesn't need you or me to do it. Let him go. Let him become the man he is destined to be. And you go become the woman you are destined to be. Let him go. And keep my name out of your fucking mouth."

Olivia grabbed her purse and headed for the door.

"I'll tell them!" Olivia stopped and turned to look at the tear stained face of Mellie Grant. "I will tell the entire world that my husband had an affair with Olivia Wallace, the daughter of a convicted murderer. It only takes one call and it is on every news station and paper by five a.m.!" Olivia closed the tense space between them and smiled at her. She couldn't help but smile at her futile attempts and refusal to listen.

"Go ahead. I am not ashamed of who I am or what Fitz and I have done. It won't matter. Olivia Wallace-Pope fell in love with Governor Fitzgerald Thomas Grant III. If the American people cannot handle that, oh well. So, do what you want, Mellie." Without another word, Olivia walked out the hotel room feeling tall and accomplished. She felt so much pride in herself, all the truths she had so willingly refused to see were clear as day now. Standing in the empty hallway, it became real that she just told the wife of her married lover that she loved him, that she was _in_ love with him. And she didn't care.

* * *

The idea of sleep refused to cross Fitz's mind as he sat up in bed staring at the black television screen. He was sitting in complete silence, trying to gather his frayed thoughts. His entire life was preparing to shift, his entire way of living about to transform. No more random walks in the middle of the night to clear his head in solitude, no more spontaneous vacations or trips to the local farmers market. He thought he wanted this, all this change and the power and perks that came with the position, but now, he just didn't know.

Fitz tried to fight it, to keep convincing himself that the oncoming changes were the most important thing in his life at the moment, but he couldn't fool himself. He missed Olivia desperately, his fabricated anger for her not enough to make his need for her vanish. Every moment he would walk in a hallway and her perfume was still faintly in the air or when he could see her giving orders across the room, his heart would jump. He told her that he needed to get his life in order before they could ever happen again, but the reality was, he was nothing without her. There was no life to get in order because she was his life. He wanted to make things work, but she had hurt him so many times...where could their relationship possibly go?

Fitz's thoughts were interrupted by a soft knock on his door. It was past midnight, so he was confused as to who would be visiting him. When he saw her standing in front of him, he couldn't find the words to say. There were none that could depict the range of emotions coursing through him simply by having her at such a close proximity. She was smiling at him, not one ounce of regret or fear in her eyes. She looked...fresh. There was a calmness about her that he had only gotten in their most intimate of moments.

"Liv, what—" She raised a finger to her lips to silence him. Without any warning her voice was filling the corridor.

"Attention residents of the fourth floor of the Four Seasons hotel! I, Olivia Wallace-Pope, am a woman in love with an _incredible_ man." Her voice was loud and proud, ringing throughout the hallway. Fitz was so shocked by what she did, the action so out of character for her. Hearing her repeat the exact words he said for her during his first debate sent chills throughout his body, the love he felt for her radiating.

The sound of a door opening sent him into a panic, grabbing her and pulling her into his room quickly. Her hands were resting on his chest, their eyes intertwined in an intense gaze.

"Liv—"

"I am so sorry. For everything."

"I know."

"I love you."

"You know I already know that." She shrugged.

"I never said it enough." They shared a smile and he rested his forehead on hers, the familiarity calming him.

"What if someone heard you?" She chuckled.

"That was kind of the point."

"I...I still need time."

"I know. And that's alright. I am in this. It doesn't matter how long I have to wait, I will wait for you. No more games." Fitz pulled away and took her in: the fearless woman standing before him was his Livvie, but the version he always knew she could become.

"I never stopped loving you. I could never..."

"I know." She broke their close embrace and sat down on the bed. Fitz crossed his arms behind his back to control himself.

"There is something you should know."

"What?"

"Before I came here, I was with Mellie. She dug up my past and threatened to release all of by morning to sabotage your potential votes. I told her I didn't care. That she can do whatever she wants but it won't make a difference. Fitz, you are going to become President and you are going to change the world." He sat down next to her and she rested her head on his shoulder.

"Mellie is at the bottom on my list of problems. I just don't want you to get hurt. The possibility of people dragging up your father and you having to relive all that again..."

"I'm a big girl. I can handle it. Regardless of what happens, we have each other, right?"

"Right." Their hands came together and they enjoyed the silence of the other's company.

"Do you want me to stay with you tonight? We may wake up to the end of the world."

"No. We have to take things slow this time. I have literally been forcing myself to not rip your clothes off since I got you in my room."

"How flattering."

Fitz walked her to the door and lingered there with her a moment. She pressed her lips to his softly and he could feel his restraint coming undone.

"Goodnight, Mr. Grant." She vanished behind the door.

"Goodnight, Ms. Pope."

* * *

Olivia found herself checking over her shoulder constantly, waiting for some gasp or shouts of shock from her staff. She came down to the campaign headquarters around four in the morning to keep herself from staring at MSNBC any longer. The knowledge that everything she had worked for was dangling by a single weak thread was driving her insane, but she had a job to do. It was half past five now and Fitz would be down soon to get ready for the craziness that was election day. The look on his face would tell her if Mellie had kept her proclamation.

"Olivia, you alright?" Cyrus was over her shoulder watching her pretend to look over polling results for the midwest.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Just nervous."

"Yeah, we all are. This is the most important day of our lives! Just think, in less than twenty-four hours, we could be on a one way trip to the White House!" That word struck a chord in her; "could". Olivia had spent her entire life living on that word: _Could have been this, could have had that, wish I could become..._ She was quickly realize that _could_ was a silly word, one filled with fear and uncertainty.

"No. We _will_ be on that one way trip. Fitz _will_ become president. No shoulda, coulda, woulda's about it." Cyrus smiled at her and patted her on the back adoringly.

"That is what I like to hear!"

The sound of the elevator doors opening brought everyone's attention to the man of the hour. Olivia could feel the grin spreading across her face as she watched him stop by every employee to greet them for the never ceased to make her feel wonderful, not a word needing to escape his lips. He was hers, completely hers, and she relished in this knowledge.

"Seems like you two are back on good terms?" Cyrus slipped in her ear before walking into the other room, a smug smile on his face. Olivia caught Fitz's eyes and he cocked an eyebrow at her. He slowly made his way over to her to confirm what she already knew.

"Is the world ending?"

"Not today."

* * *

Fitz had to be doing something, anything but watching the television. Everywhere he turned there was a television tuned to a news station broadcasting the results. He wasn't winning, but he wasn't dead in the race either. His heart could not handle the play by play of this, so he found all possible busy work. He ran for coffee, helped organize files and even managed phones. The enormity of what was happening right now was flying over his head. He has participated in many an election, but this was for it all; the entire country. It could all be his, and the fact that a few fingerprints on a screen were the veil between that becoming a reality.

He managed to find an empty conference room and rested his head on the smooth wooden table. He knew Cyrus was looking for him, but he just could not handle wearing the fake smile right now. He was a wreck, the idea of not becoming president eating away at him. He told himself countless times that he would be ok with losing, that a normal life wouldn't be awful. A simple life, an easy one with Olivia traveling the world and living. He wanted that, he truly did. But, the presidency was an idea so engrained in who he was, the fact that it was so close...it was devastating.

"Cyrus is looking for you." Her sweet voice calmed his nerves, but the bead of sweat slipping down the side of his face remained.

"I know. Tell him I'm not here." She chuckled softly.

"Governor Grant, don't you think you want to actually be able to see the results when they announce you as President-elect of this country?"

"What if I don't win?" He said softly, the worry and insecurity drained in it reminiscent of his child days.

"Then we move on. Life doesn't stop just because we don't get what we want. But, you won't have to worry about that because you _will_ win. No one is better for this job than you. I wouldn't waste a vote on someone not ready for the job." He met Olivia's soft eyes and felt a smile creep to his lips. She truly was the best thing to ever happen to him. They made their way back to the hub of the office, Fitz taking a seat directly in front of the television. Olivia went away to revise his recession speech, per his request.

The hours added up and the unknown states began to wain. The race was a dead heat, the pendulum never completely at rest in one spot. One state it was Reston, another two and it was Grant. It was down to Ohio, one small district holding the deciding votes. Fitz could feel the victory an arms length away, so close but not quite able to reach. He looked across the room at his lady standing anxiously by Cyrus, her fingers locked over her mouth in anticipation. She was rocking back and forth on her toes, something she did to keep herself from pacing. Suddenly, he felt a peace come over him. It was ok. If he didn't make the move, the world wouldn't end. He had a life now, a future with someone that he never thought he could deserve. It was enough. _She_ was enough.

"The final stations are in!" The reporter announced. Fitz continued to stare at the light of his world, he eyes directly on the tv. "Ladies and gentlemen, Republican nominee Governor Fitzgerald Thomas Grant III is your new president elect." His attention shot to the screen and when he saw his name shining at the bottom, he thought the world had just dropped from under him. It happened. This was happening. He was the _President_. He looked at Olivia who had tears streaming down her face. The feeling of her joy made him feel an indescribable pride. They did it.

* * *

Fitz was sitting in the hallway of the campaign headquarters, the silence of the office comforting him. It had been a long night, the confetti and champagne was all gone, the excitement had spread out to other areas around the city. The feeling of reciting his acceptance speech to his hometown supporters and those around the country was that of complete euphoria. He wanted to be exhausted, and deep down he knew he was, but all he wanted to just sit down and let it all sink in. He could not believe it, but it was reality. Something he had desired for so long was now his. He made it happen, something he had long been told he could never do on his own.

"Congratulations." His ears perked up at the familiar sound.

"Mellie?" Her silhouette became visible as she stepped into the light and sat down on the floor next to him.

"You were magnificent in your speech. It was perfect. You hit everything you have been saying on the trail all these months. Very humble. Very likeable. Did you like the outfits I picked out for Karen and Gerry?" He nodded.

"They looked great, Mel." He watched her, doing his best to feel out how she was doing. Twenty years of knowing her like the back of his hand and suddenly she was an enigma.

"I voted for you." She said quietly. "I almost didn't. I was still so angry...about everything. I wanted to vote for Reston, out of spite. But, you were the best for the job...you deserved this. You deserve that house, Fitz. With or without me." He reached out for her hand and she took it happily. "I am so proud of you. You proved me wrong."

"Thank you, Mel." She stood up and gathered her purse, taking a few steps before stopping.

"Did you ever love me?" He thought for a moment.

"Of course I did. You were all I knew for such a long time. There was a time when we were both on the same time, fighting for the same things. But we both changed."

"Do you love her?"

"With everything I have." He answered without a hesitation. She stood in the silence for what felt like a million moments. Finally, she reached into her purse and pulled out a manila folder.

"I signed the papers. I'm done fighting. I deserve better. We both deserve better. I expect the highest level of support for my upcoming bid for Governor of California. Congratulations, Mr. President." She tossed the folder on the floor and walked away, leaving him with the sudden burden of freedom. It was strange: the presidency took almost all his freedom away but his soon to be ex wife just granted him the greatest independence. He was finally free to love and live. It wasn't going to be easy, it would probably be the most difficult adventure of his life, but he was ready for it. The world wasn't ending, and he was more than ready to take it on.

* * *

**A/N: So, the election is done. Mellie signed the papers. Everything seems to be looking up for Fitz. What are your hopes for the future? Leave a comment! And again, thank you for keeping up with my little story and putting up with my lapse in post. I do my best, but it truly is just as frustrating for me to not have them up more frequently! **


	14. Chapter 13

**A/N: I know it has been literally a decade since I have updated this and I feel so awful! This summer became more eventful than I anticipated and sitting down and writing has not been able to top my priority list! I want to thank LoreneMichelle41 for the lovely messages and giving me the push to get back on my job! I promise to keep up with my stories as the summer begins to wind down!**

* * *

Today was the day. It was 8:45 in the morning and Fitz was adjusting his tie for the hundredth time in the mirror and sighed in irritation. Every time he fixed himself up and thought he looked all right, he would look again and find another problem. Today was the most important day of his life; his inauguration. Today, he would speak the oath of promise to serve and protect this great nation. Today was the day he officially became the protector of 313 million people. It was a day he had only dreamed of in his moments of unwarranted solitude as a child and now it was here. His emotions were indescribable, everything from excitement to fear to anticipation and insecurity. One thing he knew for sure was that he was ready for this; he wanted this.

"Mr. President." The low sultry tone of her voice made him jump from the mirror to meet her excited eyes. Olivia was a vision in a black and white gown hitting every curve and length of her body.

"Not for another thirty minutes, Ms. Communications Director." She smiled shyly and walked deeper into the room.

"Your tie. It's crooked."

"Don't remind me. I've been trying to fix it for literally over an hour." She giggled and walked over to him, her hands going to work on the silk around his neck.

"You know, for a man who is about to become ruler of a country, knowing you can't tie a tie isn't knowledge that makes me comfortable."

"Oh, hush. Maybe I did this on purpose so I could have you do it for me."

"Oh? Is that what you did? You wasted an entire hour hoping I would show up to save the day?"

"I like it when you save the day."

"I do it a little too often if you ask me. There. Finished." She inspected him then turned him to the mirror.

"Perfect. How can I repay you for your services?"

"You can't afford me."

"I can afford anything. I'm the president."

"But you said it yourself, not for another...twenty-five minutes?" He wrapped his hands around her waist and pulled her to him. Her eyes met his, questions racing past them a mile a minute."Fitz..."

"What?"

"You said you needed time. That you needed to get adjusted to life in the White House before anything—"

"I know what I said." He brought his lips to her neck, nibbling on the sensitive spot just below her ear.

"We...we can't j-just jump back into this..." He had her pressed against the wall, her legs instinctually wrapping themselves around his waist. Her walls were crumbling at a record pace, her words losing themselves in the moment. Her eyes were shut, the sweet sensations of his mouth covering every ounce of exposed flesh encasing her.

"Sweet baby, I want you up there with me. I want you by my side." Her eyes shot open and she began to push him away.

"Slow down Fitz, slow down." They were panting, the direction of their energy shifting to hot and heavy at record speed. Fitz cursed himself, knowing if he had kept his mouth shut they would still be intertwined. "Your divorce was just finalized a month ago."

"Your point?"

"What kind of look is that if you show up to your inauguration with another woman? I mean, I didn't even know you were ready to give this a go again until now...I don't have a plan! We have to ease into this."

"Livvie, I am a free man now. These last few months away from you were absolute torture. I told myself that I needed to figure things out, that I needed time away from you to clear my head but...I was wrong. I need you, now more than ever. There is nothing to think about or discuss. It is time. We have waited long enough. It is our time." She adjusted her dress, the bottom riding up from their heated moment just a few minutes ago.

"I told you I would wait for you for as long as you needed. I still mean that." He groaned.

"Olivia—"

"Let me think!" She closed her eyes and searched the depths of her mind for some crazy plan. After a few moments, it hit her. "A couple of months of just working. That was your platform, a man dedicated to the country. Show them that. The media will be intrigued to see when you start dating again, use this to your advantage. Force the media to concentrate on your policy's. When the time is right, a few months at the most, you go on a few high profile dates in preparation for your first State dinner. After the dinner you start to lay low again and that is when we slowly show ourselves publicly. Yeah...that could work. Could that work?"

Olivia always mesmerized Fitz when her mind went into fixer mode. She exuded calm and collected, but he knew her well enough to see deeper into the wheels of her mind spinning rapidly.

"It's brilliant."

"Is it?"

"It is. Want to know why?"

"Why?" For a slight moment her eyes showcased insecurity. He took her hands and gently pulled her back to him.

"Because it ends with me being able to show you off to the world. It ends with us together." She smiled at him and let a sigh of relief escape.

"Okay. This is happening. We're doing this?" Fitz just captured her lips, the only reassurance she could need.

"We are doing this."

* * *

Olivia watched Fitz with more pride than a mother as he placed his hands on the Bible and spoke the oath that would seal his place as president. The entire nation cheered as he took the final step into his destiny. What he had spent his entire life yearning for and what they had tirelessly strived for over the past year was finally completed. The world was his, and he won it all by himself. Fitzgerald Thomas Grant III finally proved to everyone that he was someone, that he was capable of doing any and everything. Olivia smiled through her tears as she saw his face confirm everything she always knew. It was in the infallible smile on his face and the knowing gleam in his eyes. It was in the added conviction and assurance his voice granted during his speech. It was in the way he looked directly at her and didn't care that the entire nation was watching. He was finally realizing that the man he was, the man the nation elected and the man that she adored, was perfectly good enough. In this moment she knew that everything would be alright, that everything they had always spoken about in hush whispers under the covers in hotel rooms would one day truly become real. His dreams were real; they were real. She could hardly wait another moment for her plan to be set into motion so that they could final prove to the world what they both finally knew.

* * *

Fitz allowed his mind to wander over the events of the day as he sat in the limo en route to his first of many inaugural balls. There was no denying that he was exhausted; the lack of sleep from excitement and running off of pure adrenaline beginning to take its toll, but he was unbothered by it. The day had been magnificent, from reciting the oath and speaking to the American people for the first time as their president to accepting the brilliant smiles and cheers as he walked the streets during the parade; every moment was inexplicable. There was no doubt in his mind that this was where he was supposed to be, doing what he was destined to do. He was itching to get into the Oval and get to work for the people that placed their entire lives into his hands. Fitz had never been a fan of the image aspect of politics: all the black tie events and interviews always bored him. He understood it was a necessary aspect of the job, but sometimes he felt like the image overshadowed the actual work that needed to be done.

"Dad?" His attention was brought back to reality as he looked over at Karen beaming next to him.

"Hmm?"

"Are you happy?" The simple depth of the question took him aback. His daughter had always been mature for her age, but there were times when her adolescence would show in full force, the simplicity of a thought taking on a meaning long beyond her years. Fitz was sure she was just asking about the newfound fame thrust upon them and if he was ready for it, but deep down he knew she was asking about all of it: the divorce, the move, an entire new life coming at a rapid pace.

"I have never been as happy as I am now. Everything is going to work out, Karen."

"I just don't want you to get lonely." He let out a soft chuckle and pulled her into his chest.

"I have you and Jer. I could never get lonely."

"You know what I mean." His mind shifted to Olivia immediately and the conversation they shared this morning.

"I don't want you to worry about my love life, honey. I have it all under control. Give your old man some credit!"

"Okay, okay. So you're really bringing me out to have the first dance with you?"

"Of course! You are the most important woman of my life. I can't imagine spinning across that room with anyone else." She snuggled in closer and he savored her presence. There was a point during the divorce when Fitz feared Mellie trying to take the kids away from him out of spite, and having them with him now meant the world to him. Fitz was learning to appreciate and cherish the things in his life so much more now that everything was changing. As the limo came to a stop and they prepared to walk into the ball, he couldn't stop thinking of Olivia and how he wished she was sitting beside him, able to share in this moment with his daughter. He wanted his family to be complete as soon as possible. He wasn't sure how dedicated he could be to this plan...


End file.
